Aw thats so sad! I liked it how it was making me think in where this poem was going.And it did that all the way till the very end. I really loved it. Its good when people right stuff where you have to think about what the writer is aiming at. And not just giving the reader all the answers straight away. Good job! :)

This is awesome! i just love it. its so what you go through etc etc. I'm just not sure how to explain what I'm thinking? In the end its cool. I'd like to see more this type of writing. :) ....I think i like it because its raw.....i think? lol i dono?

Wow man you do sound like you are or were going through a tough time. The only thing i didn't like about this is when some words don't stay on the same line...ya know? Like: "No one Knows My real pain. I can’t tell anyone What’s in my head." I kind of found it a little hard to read. The poem itself is fine to me, i just think it needed its layout restructured. Eg: "No one Knows my real pain. I can’t tell anyone what’s in my head." I dono? thats just my opinion. And what was it that you where ...

Wow that really caught me off guard at the end. like it caused me to say "Ew". Its interesting how this piece pulls you in at the start with curiosity and then makes you think about where this is going. And then right at the end it turns around and 'Bang!' I'm left there stunned and thinking, "um no thankyou." Haha. Its still a great piece. just weirded me out right at the end.

MAN THAT WAS AMAZING!!!!!!!! i loved it! everything that you've say'n in that is true, you've hit it right on the nail. Perfect in every way! i'm glad people like you are still in this world, to keep us christains going and no that he's always ther for us and watches over us. Your writting is really good to. Good on ya!! And i was thinking of a title... " his blood that pours down on us" or " the purity of his holy blood" ? dono though just making it up on tha way... good luck tho!

Man i totally agree with you on this. there is some complete tossers out there that some how think that there criticism is always right, and yet its no where near helpful and is really just a load of pointless words. They give us their blunt opinion and not ideas and help. Rar! lol

Hey that was really interesting. it like changed. left me thinking....."what?" not in like a bad way though. At the start it sounds like its going to be a fantasy type of peace and then it fully changed in the last 2 paragraphs.....unless i'm totally wrong and i've fully read it the wrong way.

Even tho i'm not a good writer, I still think that you wrote that really good. it was easy to read and i got what you meant. i enjoyed it. :)

Haha thats so sweet. I enjoyed the change of few. For me i was both think of the animal and human way in which this story was going. if that makes any sense?

That was so beautiful. It was so sad, but then right at the end it show hope for the one that wished to love her that the Queen herself. Awesome.