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AYBZ_Visionary's profile
AGE:
18
LOC: Farwell, MI
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 07
LOC: Farwell, MI
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 07
I don’t like talking about myself so here’s some quotes:
Even through a shattered soul,
living in the past, trying to bring it back
Only really needing to let go of its’ past,
to bring us the joyful and painful present,
to see the brilliant future of which is near,
that will regain its’ lovely soul
Only needing to open it to the new once again…
~Ashley Jane
You’ll be killed or seriously injured if you don’t follow the directions!
~The great words and advise from the frig manual (hehe)
Love can’t be hold by hands,
it’s hold by a true, honest soul…
the heart of the beholder.
The truth, honest and happiness is love
that a person of the soul and heart
can have-
But then why can’t every person have this in the true …
Items
Version 1
4 Reviews
2 Comments
“I got five-hundred on the babe,” voice yells from the background of hundreds of people. “Man, you ain’t really going to put money on that woman. Women can’t drive,” another voice replies. Smart choice boii… I retort with in my head, as I hop in my Firebird. Show no fear, but be the fear; gotta love da quotes of ones own. The gun fires, five cars hurtling down a drag, engines roaring as I remain in front of the four. A flash of red pasts me and I laugh at a fool’s mistake, for the turn is ne...
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Awesome piece so far :D It seems really realistic too between the thoughts, dialgue and everything. You could possibly expand into more add little more, don't have to though it good the way it is. Though this sentence bug me... "... And I didn’t exactly get it given back to me." get and given in the same sentence just doesn't sound good maybe you "...And I didn't exactly had it given back to me either." or something like that would make it read a little bit easier. Awesome Job :D You should k...
I like the idea, but I really don't think it fit with a monologue, seems to be a thought out plot. Really if you wanted to you could exspan, make it into a story. You seem to be talented enough to do so. You should go for it, you really have nothing to lose; if done properly it seems as if you would have quite the romance story.
I love your word use like scrutinizing,serendipitous, glee (one of my favorite words makes people smile when used), etc. Even with your awesome word usage your story so far is stiff, and extremely boring! It's like one of those annoying things you read out of those big books in high school, only to be left with a cliff hanger that didn't at all to you in the first place. This is annoying and depressing, I thought when I got closer to the ending of what you wrote so far it was going to get a l...
How look upon this quote could different person to person due to their own beliefs but over all it's simple, easy and understandable. Which we all know is awesome when you don't have to go in deep wonder to understand something. I like it! :D I find it to be slightly ironic due to many people probably think but probably hasn't been really said until know.
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