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AbrogatedOrder's profile
AGE:
24
LOC: Bluefield, WV
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 05
LOC: Bluefield, WV
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 05
I’m a senior college student getting ready to graduate with a degree in English/Writing, a degree in Journalism, and a minor in Communication.
I’ve been writing forever. My first real hook, however, was in 6th grade when I won a poetry contest for a limerick about a pumpkin.
I am a “professional” musician (I get paid…). I play piano, organ, trombone, acoustic guitar, bass, and a tiny bit of cello. I love nature-related things (bonsai, hiking, etc.) and try to be as ecofriendly as possible. I’m also a culture vulture; I love, love, love world cultures and am fascinated by them all. I’m a big geek and get my kicks from goofy things and technology. I laugh all the time. I also really love films. Oh, and reading/writing. Can’t forget…
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Version 1
7 Reviews
2 Comments
Father sculpted lies, and mother nothing. Love denied the bond, left heartstrings in piles. Artist chisels need thought to what they'll bring. Shun me now and again to snap the string, already our moments repel the smiles. Father sculpted lies, and mother nothing. "If you want me to fly, craft me a wing of stone, perchance, not wax---I can't leave isles." Artist chisels need thought to what they'll bring. But wax is all, and the sun or the King dropped me headlong into tidal trials. Father sc...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
11 Reviews
3 Comments
Hammers get you to strike you Find a clean, blank plank and drive you Grab the straightest to bend you Rub the dust, sap, tap, then rap you Strike unwielding just for you Yielding wood, bore board and nail you Knock you up just to leave you Fixed forever, and will never undo you
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
30 Reviews
3 Comments
Black antimatter life giving fluid flowing forever unless a rupture is made The fabric of time ripped apart spilling what's pumped from the heart now it's red Transit conduit space breaking, sending signals around Sending pain found outside to within, stating beware or activating actions through flare of the line Nebulaplasm burning from energy stored expelled facing disease held en masse White fire fights the forces colliding red carries the embers of life ever thriving when contained Pluton...
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Reviews
Hahahaha! The adult in me found this pretty silly, but the kid in me found it delightful.
I like this. It has a directness that is nice. Thinking about what these types of books could be like is enough to characterize this speaker. It is a skillful way of making the narrator here have depth, and I think that is quite crafty. I do kind of wish for maybe a little more description of these novels, just to help characterize this speaker even more. You could talk about the artwork on the covers (quite similar, usually, haha, I go book hunting at pawn shops and such), similarities in st...
I thought this was a sweet poem. It presents some thoughts that are unique to me, like babies being the slipping dancers from heaven. I looked back and imagined a kid being the speaker here. Then, I read that that kid just said "corporeal." Even without that reading, though, the word kind of sticks out. I think just saying "have bodies" will be fine, but that's my opinion. Beyond that, it really is a pleasant poem. Thank you for sharing!
I really like this. It has that "modern," beat-like feel to it. Despite what many say, it is hard to do, but you do it well here. Reading it, the poem flowed well. You set off lines in appropriate ways throughout, which aids in reading. Nice structure all around. The 4th stanza was kind of awkward for me compared to the rest. I think the jeans here are a tad out of place, since you don't really mention them beyond that. Maybe if the jinn and Smurfs were designs on jeans (it was big to draw on...
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