Afterlight's profile
AGE:
17
LOC: Canada
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: June 25
LOC: Canada
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: June 25
When things happen in real life, extraordinary things, there’s no music, there’s no dah-dah-daaahhs. There’s no close-ups. No dramatic camera angles. Nothing happens. Nothing stops. The rest of the world goes on.
~ Kevin Brooks
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I’m just here to have fun with my writing and to see what people think. Mostly I will be posting my poetry.
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Update: Things are still going slowly. It may take me forever to open r…
Items
Version 3
9 Reviews
1 Comment
Chapter One Loud, shrill screams floated up through the ceiling and the little girl climbed up the ladder to the safety of the attic. Closing the trap door behind her, she shut out the familiar noise from downstairs. Golden streaks of sunlight shone through the arched window, revealing swirling lines of dust. The girl reached out and stirred the specks with her fingers. A miniature whirlwind spun around her hand and slowly dissolved back into the air. Boxes of every size cluttered the room. O...
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Version 1
0 Reviews
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She escapes from the shadows Slipping through reality Body aglow in the snow-light Blue tinted curves Reflected in my room Naked beauty Ready to explode in romantic love throws Her silver eyes look out through mine She moves her fingers on my skin Imaginings of hands sliding down her back My back We smile and can almost hear his sigh The phantom of his lips And now as the sun rises She is gone from the mirror My squared hips and marked skin are back But he still sighs and she will return
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Version 1
1 Review
1 Comment
Cold stones under my feet. Dancing in the smell of fresh bread. Dark leather books, Holding faded still life pasts, Each moment captured in a lacy frame. Turn the page, And a young girl stands on the beach You smile, your eyes alight, and say, “That’s me.” I look at you in wonder. The soft wrinkles are thrown off. That young girl sits beside me again. I touch your face and the age returns. How beautiful you are. Once you were like me, Running in the sand. Someday I will be like you. The old a...
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Version 2
0 Reviews
0 Comments
Tangerine Tangerine, darling Your flaming red locks Floating in swirls About perfect round breasts Slip in your chamber With spice and perfume Lead with your freckled smile Distract and enchant him Breathing you in Grab your porcelain wrists And push, push The moans The heat Pretty fingers Move on his skin And enter his heart Tearing it out Feel the beat quicken Blood dripping on the white sheets Crimson droplets in your hair Tangerine, darling (Old Version) Tangerine, darling Your flaming re...
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Version 2
44 Reviews
27 Comments
Waves crash against the immense gray cliffs. High at the top she dances, her skin sparkling with spray. Delicate feet prance on the rocks, twirling her back and forth in intricate patterns. The blue dress swirls open and closed like a fast blooming flower. She dances faster, faster, toes hardly touching the ground, making her long locks fly in wild turns around her head. She lifts her arms to the sky, reaching as high as she can with her thin white fingers, as if she longs to catch the dusty ...
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Everything happens too quickly. You hardly know what's going on and then it's over. The last two lines don't fit as well with the rest of the poem. They don't flow as nicely. Thanks for sharing.
This is really beautiful and sad. I just sat thinking for a while after I read it. I don't have anything to criticize. It's lovely just the way it is. Thanks for sharing.
I don't really have any idea what this is about but it's beautiful. I really like these lines. "an armoir with a door that will not close/dust on a window that will not open". I get a good image in my head from it. I thought some of the lines were confusing and I had to read them out loud for it to make sense. I read it a few times though and I really like the flow. Great job.
A lot of the lines in this poem felt to heavy. Too many words. The lines are cluttered. I like a lot of the imagery in it but all together it feels like too much. It gets all jumbled up at the end and it's almost hard to tell what is going on. I enjoyed reading it though. Thanks for sharing.
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