Brynn's profile

Brynn avatar
AGE: 23
LOC: Canada
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: December 14

An enigma, even to myself.

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Version 2
3 Reviews   5 Comments
“Leon! Hurry up dear, you know how bad it lookz to everyone when we are late.” “Josephine, how many timez muzt I tell you, I HATE it when you call me Leon!” Napoleon replied, as he re-adjusted his black silk scarf for the fourth time. “Tsk.” His wife flounced off. “Your scarf looks fine, you cannot even notice zee tear! Come now, we must be off.” Josephine huffed as she flung back a loose curl from her shoulder. Her flowing cream coloured ballroom gown glowed in the dim candlelight, as she c...
Ratings & Rankings
Flash Fiction / Cryptic Logic (Erotica)
Version 6
14 Reviews   13 Comments
Burnished amber candlelight sways softly in pools of shadow, licking the heated darkness. The satin veil slips off her shoulders, dropping slowly to the floor. Her smooth ivory skin glows pure, her full breasts stand firm in anticipation. She sucks her perfect lip with coquettish pleasure, pulling it through her teeth. Her long wavy hair hangs loose and flowing down her back, caressing the top of her sensuous curves. Deep, liquid blue eyes study him; reclined on the bed, his muscular frame p...
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Version 2
3 Reviews   3 Comments
Hot blood splashes over the carpet, white The gory mess a horrid sight. He sliced and carved, through carnal lust; Her bones and skin with every thrust. Breathing hard, he stands and smiles The taste of sweat, to him beguiles. Pretty blonde hair lays torn from her head, The silly young girl he'd lured to his bed. Harold stretches and scratches his wiry beard. Flicks off a piece of her bowel; smeared. His lust fulfilled and passion tamed, Steps over whats left of her body; maimed. He places he...
Ratings & Rankings
Poetry / Ode To Scotland
Version 3
4 Reviews   6 Comments
Ode To Scotland Misty moors and swells of heather, Thistle leaves as downy feathers. Soaring cliffs to bracken plains; Becalming so; the peaceful rains. Jagged firths and shadowed bows, A yearning in the soul aroused. Enticing winds through endless green; I've heard your whisper and I've seen. Grey shores with silkies on the sand. Great stags and boars enrich the land. Solemn cliffs as tri-masts sail. Atop the peaks yon pipers wail. Mysterious so, and filled with past Strong yet sure always s...
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Poetry / Ye Olde Western
Version 3
8 Reviews   9 Comments
Ye Olde Western The sweltering sun beats a path on down Baking the desert to a crisp golden brown Sizzling sand crackles, mirages alight Not a breeze, not a movement, not before night Off in the distance, a dusty ol' town Grubby mill workers and Madams mill 'round Horse drawn carts and tumbleweeds alike Bank robbers, gun slingers, ready to fight A tavern, a blacksmith, the good ol' sheriff's place A real western town, its bar wenches in lace See the beggars and sellers, cowboys and such Wild ...
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Reviews
Limericks / I Don't Do That!
Ha, well dont we all feel that way at some point? Overall its fairly good. I LOVE the fact that you branched off a bit from the normal "there once was a guy named larry" thing. GOOD job! My suggestion though would be (and I know that you were trying to follow the rhyme) but the use of the word "hollow" almost doesnt fit in this case. although "Shallow" doesnt rhyme quite as well, the word makes more sense there. Other than that nothing bad to say. Its great and true! lol well done. Eve
Limericks / Scan Disk Function
Okay, well it WAS going along great...then I hit the last line and kinda stumbled. It neither rhymes nor flows with the same count. Maybe on purpose? Not sure why bus schedule...although the general absurdity of "bus schedule" DID give me a laugh. I loved that fact that in a Limerick you used a word like "lecherous" too many times in limericks are used 3 letter words that are so simple as to bore the reader to tears! Well done. Now as far as the "Publishable as short story" bit..um 1/10 its n...
Limericks / Who Would Have Known?
HA! Oh lordy, poor guy! I wont get into the "limerick beats" bull, since you pulled it off well and it flows just fine. Cute and sassy, to the point. Other than that cant find anything to correct, well done! Gave me a laugh. Eve
Humor/Satire / Basketball Barnes
Oh god THIS sums up my highschool experience as well. I HATED sports. LOL The awkwardness and complete bafflement at the whole sports thing in your character is great. So completely oblivious. Some suggestions: " came our house " came TO our.. "brother and me" Brother and I "several directions" too many spaces. "move move" comma between move. "the game is must" what? take out IS Other than that I couldnt find too many mistakes. Overall well done, could easily be made into a larger "book-type"...
Humor/Satire / American Business
Haha, well isnt that the truth. Stupid job interviews. Ugh. LOVED the snappy ending, good line. Suggestions: "utterly pointless like"semi colon after pointless. "reccomended." Its recommended. "simple. but" comma not period. "or razors." OF razors? Maybe the last line would read better "We only asked you what your middle name is." Other than that, well done! lol Dont we all hate those interviews. Good blurb for a business magazine or some sort. Good job, cant wait to read more. Eve