Cavity's profile
AGE:
20
LOC: Waco, TX
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: August 19
LOC: Waco, TX
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: August 19
I’m many things that are too complicated to describe.People are my downfall, I loose so much sleep just studying people and thinking about people. I’m new to agnosticism, but I now claim it and all of my friends still think I’m a hardcore christian. Don’t know how I’m going to tell them I’m no longer (technically) a christian.
Items
Version 1
7 Reviews
4 Comments
Caramel, caffeine, chocolate, and espresso aromas mix with the faint rotting wood smell of the coffee shop. The professors sitting across from me laugh at boring jokes I’ve heard from every other professor before. Students sit typing on their laptops oblivious to the world around them. A fly skitters across my marble table top stopping briefly next to my blue berry soda in the old-time glass bottle. Jumbled together voices create a quiet gentle hum with certain distinguishable words like “de...
Version 1
6 Reviews
0 Comments
Where I live there is a location called Lover’s Leap because, as old waconian legend states, an Indian and his lover were not allowed to marry so they jumped off of a cliff together. Lover’s Leap is a large cliff over looking the gorgeous blue Brazos river and the small suburban houses of Waco. The legend makes the cliff embrace the tragic romantic feel most writers can never successfully emulate, while at the same time keeping the cliff’s serene beauty. I picture the two Indians on Lovers’ ...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
As I hold my eyes to Mother Mary so she’ll understand, I fantasize about you because you are burned into my retina; Your soft warm breath gently caressing my ears, Calling to me like the curiosity of Pandora’s Box, Pulling me in like a narcissist’s reflection. While small beads of blood and sweat Pioneer a worn pathway that dribbles down my hands, I can feel the rosary I pray with cutting into my thick skin. I’m distracted because I realize our first time will be our last, And I’m tired of be...
Version 2
11 Reviews
0 Comments
I can feel an indescribable pain in my chest where I feel as if nothing will fill me up, and my thoughts keep racing back and forth. Everything I feel, at the moment, I deserve for being naïve and thinking I was special enough not to be added to the statistic--- Believing there was love beyond sex. There is no such thing as romantic love. All that exists is sex. Sex is emptying whether attached to a beautifully written score in a romantic comedy or in an average hotel room where you spread yo...
Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
My hands are trembling Throat closing Nose running Unsteady shaking gasps for air Salty taste in my mouth Dirty skin I do not deserve my skin I can feel an indescribable pain in my chest where I feel as if nothing will fill me up, and my thoughts keep racing back and forth. Everything I feel, at the moment, I deserve for being naïve and thinking I was special enough not to be added to the statistic. Believing there was love beyond sex. There is no such thing as romantic love. All that exists ...
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Reviews
Woah intense. Love the images you used, and I can really feel the anger of the writer the "cut these words on the insides of your eyes" is intense and interesting. I want to know what the person did to you. It might make the poem more intense, but its a really awesome poem. Good job.
This is an interesting poem. I am not a fan of the repetitive line "it is the valley of the shadow of death." I find it too telling and unnecessary. The words you choose to rhyme with are too simple, this might have been better if you used free-verse. The rhyme's like "say" and "day" "sad" and "had" are too predictable. Other than the earlier critiques I enjoyed the images used in this poem. Good work overall!
I'm not a fan of the rhyming used on this poem. The words you are choosing to rhyme are too simple and taking away from the overall meaning of the poem. The line "my love my heart are not yours and will never again will be" confused me. I think you need to make part of the line "will never again be". The beginning two lines the "to let go while holding on/to be soft while being strong" isn't necessary at the beginning. It doesn't really put me in the mindset for what the rest of your poem is ...
This is simple and light. I like it. You misspelled the word apropos. Just need to add the "s" there. It reminds me of a children's book with its simplicity.
Interesting. You took me through a journey, a well moving story. There were good images and you transported me to a place in someone else's life. My only real criticism is that you could expand this. You could develop the daughter character more build hopes and dreams for her more, imagine what the daughter character could have done, and it will make the death feel like a loss. Anyways, job well done.
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