Cavol's profile

Cavol avatar
AGE: 23
LOC: NY, NY
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: January 05

I’m not all certain what to put here, I’ve never been the best at writing about myself. If you really care, go to my myspace page.

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Short Story / Mailbox
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Jon has been leaving many messages on Jason’s voicemail every day. Jon stopped leaving messages on Jason’s voicemail three days ago. Poor Jason’s been facedown, naked and dead for three days now. But nobody knew Jason was dead till today.  
Ratings & Rankings
Version 3
0 Reviews   0 Comments
And by the certainty of death by drowning when babies lay face down in pools that reach them past the creases in their necks--- I shall be on my hands and knees on nails to hem you by your underbelly; To hem you by your under-loins, my sweet.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 2
0 Reviews   0 Comments
And by the certainty of death by drowning when babies lay face down in pools that reach them by the creases in their necks-- I shall be on my hands and knees on nails to hem you by your underbelly; To hem you by your under- loins, my dear.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
And by the certainty of death by drowning when babies lay face down in pools that reach them by the creases in their necks-- I shall be on my hands and knees on nails to hem you by your underbelly; To hem you by your under- loins, my dear.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
15 Reviews   10 Comments
 When life gives you layers, belt it at the waist.
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Flash Fiction / Wake Me Up
I think this will appeal to very many people in the sense that it talks about something as rudimentary as waking up from a more profound out look. I think it's good how you express the tedium of it all from your mention of hitting the snooze button multiple times to laundry and deadlines and all that stuff.
Humor/Satire / The Sandwich
The good: -The whole thing was very visible - I could almost see it acted out in front of me (facial expressions and all) even in places where descriptions weren't given. I can totally see Dave's grandiose outbursts and Cheryl's sarcastic indifference to it. -"Harlot! I now see what your game is!" - very funny The bad: -(logistics) No way that sandwitch was still fresh after 4-5 days in the fridge; at least wilt the lettuce The bottom line: I kinda like it, but don't get it at the same time. ...
100.0% Review Quality (3 Votes)
Flash Fiction / Burnout
The good: Your economy of language. The story leaped from simple mind tricks to getting shot in the head by the pigs but still somehow felt informed. I think it would create an even more interesting juxtaposition if the simple tricks were even simpler; like blowing away people's hats on non-windy days rather than levitating cars ect. The bad: "Knocking down trees just by looking at them, levitating cars, and all the other perks of having the power of a god." - That sentence is fragmented when...
100.0% Review Quality (3 Votes)
Flash Fiction / The Voice in His Veins
The good: The bad: - "...he shouted, still running his hands through his hair, now not in an attempt at discovery, but due to sheer nerves" - there's gotta be a better way to articulate that. Perhaps if you only had 1 tag i.e. take out the bit about him running his hands thorough his hair and tag some other bit of dialog with that instead. - "Damn hell. I just got a new rug!" - You didn't paint this guy out to be very sophisticated, so I think the last thing that someone like him (someone who...
100.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
Flash Fiction / Role Models
The good: -You choices for potential role models. The best way I could describe it is carefully chosen at random. Meaning you have such a wide variety of images from Hilary swank to the traffic sign lady but they all fit together somehow. -That you didn't choose Paris Hilton or Britney or Lindsay Lohan; the more obvious options for a piece on role models for women/girls -The repetition of your mom and sisters -"...or maybe Demi Moore, who proved trophy wives could divorce, could obtain trophy...