You literally have a million and one facts sewed into this very lengthy debate. At times, as you may be doing so for emphatical purposes, your point gets repetitious and you begin to lose credibility. All in all, a very well argued paper. Just don't get overdone with your subject ... make your point and let it resonate on your reader ... don't contiually beat it into their skulls. And smoke on! Nice job!

You write so descriptively and your character development is excellent! Writing in the first person is difficult, I think, in a long narrative form but you handle it well, stay consistent and never lose sight of your initiative. I look forward to reading Chap. 1. Keep Writing!!

This is too funny, very well written and extremely clever! I'm very interested to read other issues of your column! I also write a pretty popular relationship/sex column from the female perspective! We should compare! Good Work!

This is such a powerful story but you lose it in your structure and over-simplicity.

Good for you! I love this! It's honest and simple and true you! I've heard something similar of Def Poetry ... this is perfect for a reading, I could imagine so much attitude behind it! I wish more writers would consider not being so abstract all the time and just writing, for real!

Well hey ... another issue! Very good man! Our styles are very similar! I love it!

first ... since when did reviews become bashings on beliefs rather than uh, I don't know, REVIEWS! Second ... I already know what you think of this piece, and as long as it served the purpose, but I like it because it's straight. no frills, you know? Well ... you didn't change the world with this one Ray, but you will one day!!

Well you definitely know your stuff, and while I am not a huge fan of Star Trek you engaged me, which is a task in itself. Great description, excellent detail ... very nicely written and funny too! So how long have you been following the series? True Treky huh?

You have a beautiful sense of imagery in this poem. It paints a wonderful picture, drenched in every detail of your words. The repitition at the beginning of each stanza always brings you back to the whole picture, your whole idea and then allows you to drift off and then start fresh again. I am in love with your line " a small music box of feathers and heartbeats" What an image! My only criticism may be to try to replace the word "I" with other references to yourself, and the world around yo...