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Deathbonewitch's profile
AGE:
17
LOC: Saint Louis, MO
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 04
LOC: Saint Louis, MO
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 04
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Items
Version 1
8 Reviews
1 Comment
A boy was watching the surroundings pass him by as his mother drove the car back to their house from the yearly family gathering at his grandparent’s house out in the country. The boy looked at least twelve years of age, although not far off from thirteen. He stuck out in one way: short, pure white hair. The athletic build he had suggested he had grown up playing sports. It was an eight-hour drive one way, and with just his mother and himself in the car. Talking got boring quickly, leaving t...
Version 3
2 Reviews
0 Comments
A boy was watching the surroundings pass him by as his mother drove the car back to their house from the yearly family gathering at his grandparent’s house out in the country. The boy looked to be twelve years of age, although not far off from thirteen. He had pure white hair that was no longer than three inches anywhere on his head. The athletic build he had suggested he was someone who had grown up playing sports. It was an eight-hour drive one way, and with just him and his mother in the ...
Version 2
9 Reviews
3 Comments
“All rise as the honorable Judge Byron enters.” The judge walked into his court room, which as of late had become one of the most watched places in the country. Presently there was a sickeningly twisted and baffling case that was at trial in his jurisdiction. He looked around the court room that he was getting tired of seeing. In his 27 years of being on the bench he had heard some disturbing and damning things, but this case was the most mind-melting case yet. “Please take your seat,” Byron...
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Reviews
Fifth line down, second paragraph/stanza, take out "my". It all seems in form till the third part which could be a new stanza and is basically a paragraph, but the others seemed more organized. It was interesting and bespoke emotional pain on a high level, but it took me a little while to figure all of it out personally, but once I read the father part all the pieces fell in place.
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