DrChaos's profile
AGE:
51
LOC: Staten Island, NY
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 23
LOC: Staten Island, NY
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 23
Tom has lived many lives within a single lifespan. He is known among the people whose lives he has touched as an adventurer, a lifestyle entrepreneur, a thinker, and athlete.
Two quotes that have been said by others about Tom:
“What you think is challenging, Tom thinks is routine. What you think is impossible, Tom thinks puts on his to do list.”
“There are those who resist change, those who embrace change, those who drive change and Tom.”
Items
Version 1
3 Reviews
4 Comments
Predict your future by creating it.
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Version 3
1 Review
1 Comment
There's a place I've always dreamed of Where the hearts all are true Will you stay with me if I take you there Or will you leave and find someone new Its not in vain that I ask this question For my heart belongs to you Believe in us and you will find That our love is always new
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Version 2
0 Reviews
0 Comments
There's a place I've always dreamed of Where the hearts all are true Will you stay with me if I take you there Or will you leave and find someone new Its not in vain that I ask this question For my heart belongs to you Believe in us and you will find That our love is always new
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Version 2
0 Reviews
0 Comments
CROSSING THE LINE The next day I decided that I wanted to spend the entire day exploring the southeastern part of Kenya, closest to Mt Kilimanjaro. I was especially interested in seeing flowers, birds and small animals that tend to stay near the lush areas created by the run-offs. I was up long before sunrise since I wanted to see the sun slowly climb above Kilimanjaro. I grabbed some breakfast and a nice hot cup of coffee and sat myself on a rock to watch the show. It did not disappoint. As ...
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Version 1
1 Review
1 Comment
Today in New York it is raining, dreary a day that makes you feel pessimistic. I remember six years ago. It was another beautiful day in New York. We had a string of beautiful says leading to September 11th. This time of year in New York can be the best time of the year with moderate temperatures, low humidity with the sun shines with optimism. September 11th, 2001 began that way. The year had been a challenging one, but things were beginning to look better. It was the beginning of a new scho...
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Overall I like the lyrics, though I thought that it may flow as a song better if you removed some words. For example: 2nd line remove "all of" 1st line in the chorus remove all 2nd line in chorus remover "All of" 2nd line in bridge remove view Hope this makes sense and help!
I like this for the most part. These lines didn't work for me: "Walking on a double-edged knife Careful not to run" Not sure what to suggest to improve, though I get your point. Also in this: "All justice for me is banned" Maybe replace "All justice" with "Freedom" ? Hope this helps!
Its good overall, I think some restructure may help. One thing would be to swap the lines starting with "As night..." with "This empty hate....". This sort of has the flow, what, how and then hope. Hope this helps!
Its good but I think a bit of re-ordering might make it better. If I may make a suggestion I will refer to each section by number and suggest a new order. Section 1, 2 and 3 as is. Then Section 7, 5, 6. Then Section 4, 8, 9. Also for Section 5 remove "once again" in line 1. Remove "You're back with" from line 3. And possibly remove "Stones of my shoulder" from line 4. Hope this helps!
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