Eessa's profile

Eessa avatar
AGE: 49
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: June 05

I am a Psychology lecturer and I write in my spare time.  The poems that appear on my profile have been written by me over several years and have already been published in anthologies.  The poem ‘Timothy’, for example, is actually twenty years old and was first published in the 1980s.

My first novel has just been self-published and has had some positive feedback from people who have read it, but more feedback on all of my writing is always welcome.

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Short Story / IN TWO HALVES
Version 1
2 Reviews   0 Comments
It was in two halves – but they were certainly not the same. One was prosperous, full of professional people – commuters, who spent more time on trains than they did at home. The other was poor and some might say deprived; a working class community with no work left. The factories closed, the mines now flooded, they picked up their social security payments and watched TV. The pub was their only social outlet; another group of people spending less and less time at home. Only time will tell whe...
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Poetry / WORKING
Version 2
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Here I go again. Another working day attacks me As I slumber in my bed. Work is not the problem though; It’s the bosses I so dread, Not because they’re frightening or Even awe-inspiring. Just because I find their pettiness so tiring. “Fill in that and fill in this.” This paperwork, to them, is bliss. So, here we go again, Like sheep for shearing, we continue to obey the orders made. This, although they’re clearly wrong, And we can feel our independence fade. But who dare say a single work, fo...
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Poetry / DEPRESSION
Version 1
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The sensuous fingers of a gentle, westerly breeze Trip lightly ‘cross my cheeks, Awakening my mind from its momentary daydream. The green hills before me seem to resonate, Like ripples on a barren pond. And here I sit, alone for once, amid the orchestra of my thoughts And wonder to myself, “Is all I am to be, complete?” Then, as if I’d wished it so, and Like the plucking of a harp, The raindrops dance through overhanging trees. Still, somehow my desire for warmth is lost, Within a deeper long...
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Poetry / SWEET REVENGE
Version 1
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I always dreamed of playing football When I were a lad. I used to train wi’ local team And kick about with dad. But come the weekend I was always Left back, on the bench. “You’re rubbish lad!” the Coach would shout, His teeth jammed in a clench. Then one November Saturday The Ref collapsed and died. “Come on son, get on the pitch!” Me dad called out, with pride. My heart were pounding like a cannon; I’d finally found me place. And, whistle hung around my neck, I took the field with grace. Now...
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Poetry / SNIFFY
Version 1
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“Stop that awful sniffing! Go and blow your nose!” That’s what my mum said to me, But sniffing’s what I chose. “You’ll give yourself a chesty cough!” She kept on telling me. I didn’t listen; then one day I sneezed into my tea. I couldn’t stop the sneezing. It’s carried on for years. It really is quite painful And it brings me near to tears. I’ve been to see the doctor; He looked at me and said, “There’s so much gunk stuck up your nose, It’s a wonder you’re not dead!”
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Lyrics / Want me.
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Poetry / Canary
This was a very enjoyable poem, particularly for me because I used to breed canaries as a child and it brought back memories of all the birds my father and I used to keep. The line 'A caged canary sings her censored melody' captures the canary's song beautifully and the poem hints at the longing for freedom that we all have, while pointing to the way that freedom is so often restricted, cruelly, by those around us, those in charge. Keep writing.
0.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
The sentiments evident are moving but the story lacks structure which, for many readers, will reduce some of the impact such sentiments could have on them. The final message is important but required a lengthy journey through a maze of phrases and feelings that, to some extent, took something away from that message. With some careful thought about structure and minor improvements to punctuation and grammar, this could be a very thought-provoking and moving short tale. Nevertheless, it may be ...
This is quite a useful piece of writing for new writers. There was one spelling mistake, which I feel is a shame, considering that it is an advisory text on how to write (“Damn! My work is better then that. This should have been 'better than' not 'better then'). However, there is some very good advice to which I would add that publishers and agents don't always know best. As a self-published author, rejected by many publishers and agents, I would recommend self-publishing, with certain pre-co...
There were a number of spelling, grammar and punctuation issues, but as it is a draft I will focus on the story itself. I have not read the first chapter, which may put me at a slight disadvantage, but I feel it was fairly easy to pick up the gist of the story so far from what was available here. I was amused by some of the discussion about heaven, hell and religious beliefs. The discussion kept my interest, certainly. However, it would have been improved if I had had some character informati...
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Poetry / Here & Now

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