Emeraldominance's profile
AGE:
19
LOC: Olney, MD
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 18
LOC: Olney, MD
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 18
Most of the pieces, currently can be found on either my myspace or my xanga.
I love writting. It’s not only a passion, but a pastime for me. I write when I feel. I write to express, not impress.
In a sence, I thrive on critisism, though I guess everyone does, to a point. I’m not new to writting, just new to it being so public. In the past, I kept my writtings private, hidden from view. Now, I post them here, in order to become a better writter. I’m not looking for people who will tell me how great and wonderful my work is. I want honest reviews, and suggestions on how I can improve my pieces.
Enjoy.
-Amber
Items
Version 1
4 Reviews
2 Comments
I look at you, and I want to at once hold you and hit you. I love you, dammit! I can't do this. I don't know where to look next. Tear after tear blurs my vision. I'm still here, yes. Unfortunately. I thought I knew you. I let you in. You knew me. I did everything in my power to love you. To show my love. My life revolved around you. I'm left to pick up everything. To try and find the pieces of my heart that are now lost forever. You stole it. And now you refuse to give it back. You're stringi...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
To italicize, simple put an unserscore (_) before and after what you would like to italicize. No spaces are between the underswcore marks and the first or last letters. To input an underscore, press shift and the hyphen (-) key. _This is italicized_ To bold, input a star before and after the word or phrase you wish to be bold. *This is bold* To underline, insert a plus (+) sign before and after what you want to underline. +This is underlined+
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
2 Reviews
2 Comments
I'm home. Finally. But things aren't right. I'm alone. I wanted a hug. I wanted a kiss. None of which I got. I wanted the world to be within my grasp. It was for a time. Not anymore. But, if loving someone means letting go of them in order for them to be happy, then I suppose that is what I must do. So this is my final farewell.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
2 Reviews
2 Comments
Your eyes shine brighter than the stars in the sky and burn with more essence than a florida sunset -AIM Away Message
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
5 Reviews
5 Comments
Staring out the window, the ground outside flooding, she lets it all out. It was almost as if the storm outside, had forced its way into her heart. As though a terrible war was going on inside her mind and all the blood that had been shed, ended up being hers. And she was absolutely powerless against the knife that seemed to have a mind of its own. Wanting to dance along her leg, leaving a trail of red, wherever it decided.
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With the grammar, the only three places you use it are here, "Will it still be in our future?/" here, "We took it all, all that was/" and here, "For the children of the future?/". I think the poem reads well, as is. However, if you were to use grammar, my opinion is to use it consistently - not sporadically (sorry if I misspelled that). I like the poem; it reads well. I liked how you spell numbers out (ex. "Maybe we have twenty years or more"). It doesn't seem as though there is a rymning sch...
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Wow. Powerful piece you have here. I believe it conveys emotion in each line. Generally, I dislike when poems are not broken into stanzas, but that format seems to work for this poem. I will try to give critisism first, then praise, but no promises: 1. I like it when grammar is used through out the piece; however, not when it consists of only commas. I am a fan of periods at the end of a line, as well. 2. In this line, "And I’d do it all again for you,/" what exactly would you do again? Assum...
It's good. What grade did you get on it? I dislike the fact that in some parts of the piece, you use grammar, then in others, you use none. My belief is, if you use grammar in one line, you should use it in all of them, or not at all. Either include grammar, or don't. I don't like switching back and forth. This poem sounds more like the telling of a story to me, than a poem. If you expanded it a bit more, pulled the reader in some more, maybe used a few more descriptons, it could serve as an ...
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