JEBradwyn's profile

JEBradwyn avatar
AGE: 24
LOC: Warner Robins, GA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 12

How many times must I fall off this horse?!

“For as long as I’m still breathing” is the only answer I’ve got.

No more delays. The next chapter of my epic begins now!!

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Nice to Meet You, Me, Chapter 1
Version 2
4 Reviews   4 Comments
“A train leaves Denver, Colorado for Atlanta, Georgia at 9:30 AM. Another train departs from Mobile, Alabama and is also destined for Atlanta, Georgia. This train departs at 12:00 PM. Both trains reach their destination simultaneously. What is the speed of each individual train and the time of their arrival? Show your work.” The closest answer Jeremy Edgerton could immediately produce to such a ridiculous question was profuse sweating and increased heart rate. Unfortunately, neither reaction...
Ratings & Rankings
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Griuon Prologue
Version 1
6 Reviews   6 Comments
PROLOGUE The one called Wandering lived according to many truths, but held two in strong repute: The first being that life was comprised of many cycles and few endings. Secondly; the wind was never as cold as it seemed. An idle sun illuminated the late morning sky, hidden behind translucent clouds. The passionless rays of light were blunt and offered no heat. In spite of his wisdom, his vacant sleeves flapped behind him in the gentle breeze pressing against him. Beneath his thick cloak, his ...
Ratings & Rankings
Haiku/Senryu / Fast Food Alley
Version 1
8 Reviews   7 Comments
Zaxby's to the left. McDonalds (is) to the right. Fat man's paradise.
Ratings & Rankings
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Griuon ch1&2
Version 1
16 Reviews   11 Comments
Chapter I: Shadows of Sanctuary Restful nights were becoming less common for Anjaa. Her consciousness writhed with the torment of a nameless disturbance; the haunt of faceless premonitions warring within her soul. It was one more reminder that she was different from the world around her. She was Aclabadean. She had long ago given up on chasing every errant whisper of her deviant bloodline that wafted throughout Sardisa Abbey. Since her arrival to the strange and beautiful sanctuary all those ...
Ratings & Rankings
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Griuon Chapter 2 (Preview)
Version 1
8 Reviews   7 Comments
Chapter 2: A Light in the Darkness The Ekkis Lanz sizzled and burned into the pillar, refining itself to the ruby complexion of a lucid mirror. The curtain of night thinned a little ways away from its presence, unable to veil the small but powerful light emanating beneath its folds. A crisp new energy invigorated the air like a sliver of dawn. Ensnared in awe, Anjaa swallowed a hard knot settled in her throat. The symbol flourished in a halo of radiance. Like a moth drawn to fire, she wanted ...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Query Letter / The Cain Letters
I'm not really sure what to say about a cuerie letter. I've never read or written one before, so my opinion means VERY little. I'm ESPECIALLY ambivalent about the name-dropping reference to Dan Brown. I guess it depends on the publisher, I suppose. I think by using another's name to describe your style already sets the reader/publisher's mind as to what to expect, which may be a good or bad thing depending on if that is in fact what they're looking for. It's also a double-edged sword dependin...
To be completely honest, I wasn't in the mood to read something with this depressing a start at first. The use of blatant profanity in a YA story was also a deal-breaker for me...BUT I say all that as a merit to your talent. Despite my mindset already stacking against you, I couldn't help but keep reading! Page 5 seemed a bit weak compared to the parts that came before it. It seemed that your fairly air-tight narration style began to slip around that point. "clapping like crazy" and "Indian s...
Sci Fi & Fantasy / The Cain Letters - Chapter 2
So cool! I'd buy this. Got a few grammar nit-picks and suggestions, but for the most part, I like where this is going. "...his glazed eyes radiated...a hard-on and, hopefully, dirty sex..." (pg 3) 'hopefully'--should be "and the hope for" or something like. "She squinted, filtering through the gyrating bodies in their skin-tight leathers and flashy silks and sexy legs and pumped arms, the strobe lights and smoke." over-use of "and". (pg 4) I liked how Kyan echoed my own concerns about Alex sh...
Sci Fi & Fantasy / The Cain Letters - Chapter 1
I'm kinda new to vampire literature, but I most certainly did enjoy this! The first paragraph was kinda rough to envision, along with a few other parts, especially Nikolas's eyes being described as red, and then suddenly azure is thrown into the picture. "He would let the sun VAPORIZE him before anyone else acquired the one thing..." The drama-king in me was really underwhelmed with the word "vaporize" in this sentence. It sounded a bit too cliche. In my opinion, it created a rather silly ima...
Poetry / debaseball
I enjoyed this poem, even if I didn't understand parts of it ("The stick thwacks his shoe"?) I liked the imagery; it painted a full picture of what was going on in the baseball stadium; captured everyone from the crowd, the pitcher, batter, etc. Made me really "feel" the atmosphere. Let's put it this way: I'm not even REMOTELY a baseball fan, but was really pumped about the imagery you put into this...which really made it all the more difficult to swallow the cynical twist at the end. Overall...