JHarvey's profile
AGE:
27
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 23
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 23
Hi,
Thanks for visiting my page! I’m currently working on a contemporary teen mystery set in Orange County, CA. I look forward to hearing your feedback!
Happy Writing,
Jeanette
www.twitter.com/jeanetteharvey
www.jeanetteharvey.com
Items
Version 1
20 Reviews
25 Comments
“Are you ready for your mug shot, Tori?” A tanned arm shoves a camera phone in my face, capturing a close-up as I traipse my way up the marble steps to the grand foyer of the Paradise Crown—Orange County’s hottest new hotel. I recognize the arm and the haughty voice that accompanies it all too well. It belongs to none other than Rose Vilan, the overachieving, snake-eyed sophomore who I believe relocated from New York to California with the sole purpose of making my li...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
5 Reviews
9 Comments
“Are you ready for your mug shot, Tori England?” A tanned arm shoved a camera phone in my face, capturing my bewildered expression as I made my way up the marble steps to the grand foyer of the Paradise Crown—Orange County’s hippest and hottest new hotel. I recognized the arm and the haughty voice that accompanied it all too well. It belonged to none other than my classmate Rose Villan, the overachieving, snake-eyed sophomore, who I believe relocated from New York to C...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
16 Reviews
21 Comments
Anbar Province, Iraq So this is what death feels like. Ryan lay on his back and tried to blink several times. Everything around him was black. He tried to focus on his surroundings. Was that a scream? No. It was just the echo of the explosion ringing in his ears. The smell of smoke invaded his nostrils and he could feel flames begin to lick his skin. They grabbed at his legs and tried to pull him closer. He felt hollow and alone. I can’t die like this. Not in a country that isn&rs...
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Reviews
I like the story concept you've created here--girl learns the life-changing news that her father is a werewolf. I also like that your protagonist is a strong female character. This passage starts with a lot of "telling" and I think there are ways you can convey this scene and make it even more dramatic. Instead of starting with the character waking up and thinking about when her parents dropped the big news on her, what if you actually show us that? Maybe start with the scene where her parent...
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