Amazing use of language.

Wonderful use of imagery, but slightly lacking in comprehension. The title is n't easily paired with the meaning. Work on clarity.

In the 6th line, it says "on" instead of one. This poem catches my curiosity.

The rhyme scheme doesn't quite flow as smoothly as it could. Check the rhyming within the first several lines.

"as the morning does awaken" Perhaps try being rid of the word "does" in this statement. It needs a little editing in terms of word order, especially in the beginning. The anaphoras are very effective, however.

The colloquial aspects of this composition make it very real and relatable, yet there are some verb/subject/tense agreement issues. Review verb usage. Also, the beginning of the poem seems very loosely related to the rest of it. The connection is unclear.

I struggled throuh the first paragraph. Some of the word order is a bit off. "The kindness of strangers, most of them older women, brought tears each time she remembered small gestures." I feel like there's a word missing here. The end of the sentence isn't quite the right fit. Perhaps try "their small gestures." "They knew why she was running – it was unspoken." The structure of this sentence seems to want to say; "They knew why she was running - it need not be spoken." The dash is misused. ...

"fiancé’s" should be "fiancée’s" (Two e's with the accent on the first one.) The ending has a much better hold on my attention than the beginning. In the second sentence, the word "defecting" is awkward. Try "defective" or a synonym. Also, the word "Ares" should only be used once in the sentence. It definitely catches my attention.