KittyNadem's profile
AGE:
15
LOC: Tucson, AZ
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 30
LOC: Tucson, AZ
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 30
I am your everyday average 15 year old published author. I write, I play piano, I create graphic designs, and aspire to be a game designer… but that’s just me, what about you?
Items
Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
Look at you, look at me. What big difference do you see? I am me, you are you. What did I ever do? You've grown you've seen. But all you can do is be mean. You're peaceful now. But I'm stil hurt somehow. You don't understand anymore. You're eyes are hidden behind doors. Why do you critisize me? I'm just here. Just trying to be. I've never done anything wrong. So why won't you let me sing my song? I'm not as evil as I seem. My blooming heart sparkles and gleams. So please don't be scared of me...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
5 Reviews
0 Comments
"I can't wait for school to be ober," Complained Katie Nadem the tall girl with medium length reddish-brown hair, and very green eyes. "Yeah, this day seems to have passed by so slow it's made a new record of slowness," Liz said the beautiful blonde haired, thin faced girl. "You're telling me... Oh and I can't stay at your house long because Mom told me to be home by four thirty..." "Darn," Liz said giving a little sigh. "I have to go to math class; I'll see you at your house." "Bye Kaite," "...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
11 Reviews
0 Comments
Silly Young Girl look at you, What have you done? What is it that you do? Joke around and have fun? Silly Young Girl do nothing all day. It leads you nowhere. That's how it is nothing more to say. Yes, you don't know life's unfair. Silly Young Girl I feel sorry for you. Is this how you spend your life? Nothing ever happens nothing new. Come on I know you have some strife!
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Reviews
It definitely is a worth-while story, and the title suits it well. At this point it could go just about anywhere, but it definitely did capture my interests when I first started reading this. As I read though it, I did notice a few grammar errors, so be sure to go through your story and fix up some of these issues. I also recommend that if you use was followed by a verb (such as "was walking" change to "walked", "was jumping" change to "jumped") that you remove the was. As, I noticed a small ...
Great story! Jude is an awesome character, very realistic and believeable. There were only a few errors that I saw of, all of which are grammar and punctuation, and some, I'm sure, are typos. It's a very creative story and other than the grammar and punctuation errors it's awesome, there isn't anything that I would recommend changing. WRITE ON! Live Long, Laugh Hard! KittyNadem
These are a few pretty good sample chapters of your work. There are a few errors I noticed, such as punctuation such as the error right here - You wrote: KILL THEM KILL THEM KILL THEM - it should be KILL THEM, KILL THEM, KILL THEM. It definitely use some tightening up remove some of the was followed by verbs (example: "was walking" change to "walked" "was running" change to "ran") work on your grammar, and then it'll be ready to submit to a publisher. You have a lot of talent, and this is a r...
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