My lover is causing me pain but it's not on purpose, so does it count anyway? It does sadly. It counts. All pain counts. You have no way of denying to yourself or even to your own eyes in the mirror- You've been lied to, or cheated on, or hurt.

Dearest ______, Thinking of you makes me smile. Not the fake photo-op smile either. It’s more like teeth hurts, goofy, idiot smile. I like touching you. Whatever your surprise is today I know I’ll love it because it’s us together. I’ve been wearing your jacket all day and I think you’re right, it is lucky. I want you to know that you have my heart and that I love you. When I see you I immediately feel better. I always feel better around you and I just want you to know that. And I know you pro...

B. cracking open ribcage love. C. the way our hands fit. D. smiles so real. E. how I can’t stand us being in the same room without being close to you. F. uncontrollable laughter. G. getting lost in a new place with you. H. lip smacker kiss. J. being so supportive. M. staying up all night talking. O. how you need water when you’re overwhelmed. like your emotions turn to thirst. P. driving in your car. Q. your green-orange eyes. R. how I thought you hated my guts for the past 2 months but reall...

I have this great fear that the moment we were supposed to meet will be thwarted. Maybe it already has been. I think I saw you on the subway yesterday. I saw you and I thought; ‘we were supposed to meet yesterday on the bus’. You were supposed to sit down next to me, spill your soda on me, and we were supposed to laugh. We would make a game of cleaning it up where we touch each other more than necessary. Coincidentally, we get off the same stop. We get to talking and then there’s a moment whe...

I've been polluted by the promise of love. I seem to tear or burn or rip at it I need to touch what I feel to be as beautiful. I got me thinking, about how beautiful flowers are wild ones. And how I know they will die once i pick them. But they are just so beautiful I want them as my own and it;s tragic (i guess to most in a small way) but to me this act and my simple nature seems to torture me. Seems so intense I apply it to all aspects of my life why can't I leave it alone the torture beaut...

My hair reminds me of weeds. The kind that choke the flowers. My existence is similar I think, I am what my hair says i am. my fingers prove to be what they say I am out to be. I choke beautiful things. my mess that more then sometimes always gets in my eyes. is a promise from what wallows inside. I blink blunder bleed. The picture in my mind speaks of me crossed legged in a garden. I am a weed. I think my very nature is in direct reference to those beautiful beautifully hated things. But the...

The absolute hardest thing for me to say in the least words possible: I want it but we can't because I know how it might end.

I have this great fear that the moment we were supposed to meet will be thwarted. Maybe it already has been. I think I saw you on the subway yesterday. I saw you and I thought; 'we were supposed to meet yesterday on the bus'. You were supposed to sit down next to me, spill your soda on me, and we were supposed to laugh. Make a game of cleaning it up where we touch each other more than necessary. Coincidentally get off the same stop. Get to talking and then there's a moment where you say, "wel...

Motionless on a train. The car has come to a halt. Right next to a dumpster full of garbage and trees. I think about our trip as it has passed before it even started. I think while she warms my lap with her pillowy head. I take a sip of my juice. Cranberry and vodka. The conductor speaks. Ladies and gentleman. Announcements that boom over Casey Jones’ high tech speakers. I touch her thigh as the train picks up speed again and it isn’t as warm as her head. I wonder if maybe that is because tha...

Anything that easily lost was never worth having.