Protagoras's profile

Protagoras avatar
AGE: 29
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: September 06

I like to punch the reader in the face at the end of sentences – with dashes.

My favourite word is ‘objects’ (first syllable stressed, not the verb). Recently, however, ‘qua’ tempted me.
But then I saw it used as the first word of a sentence. This I found so tantalising, qua verbal anomaly, that its value qua non-initial word of a sentence, qua sentences including the word ‘qua’, significantly diminished in that, qua non-initial word of a sentence, ‘qua’ – I repeat, ‘qua’ qua the non-initial word of a sentence – became less attractive qua word potentially supplantive of ‘objects’ qua potential favourite word, for, when compared to the word ‘objects’, ‘qua’, qua mid-sentential ‘qua’, in fact, I decided, had less aggregate value qua va…

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Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Haiku/Senryu / Trying To Cleave Beer
Version 1
7 Reviews   13 Comments
well wordily whisked less sense ten ces sen transposed understood by few
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
10 Reviews   16 Comments
"Metaphor transmutes; tautology looks in the mirror."
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Haiku/Senryu / Brown-eyed Susan
i think 'deceased ancestry' might have been a more amusing final line. this aside, it's a peculiar image. i'm not really that sure what you're going from with this one. i guess the image is neither that exciting, and nor is there that 'magical transition' that makes a select portion of haikus so successful. i think picking a characteristic other than 'brown-eyed' that ties in with the final line or second line might work better. bottom line is, it's not really a haiku for me, other than that ...
I saw a hemmosexual woman recently - she had scissored all but one vertical portion of her dress away, polo-mint-style. Personally I would - with immense maturity of thought, with supremely inimitable wit - transpose the sentence, to read: Imagine man and woman, in a room, perhaps in bed, perhaps not, then imagine them doing sex, coming towards each other with amorous sensations in their loins. Simply outstanding. 10/10 PS: I like this invention of 'Imagine...' - gonna try one myself.
Novel Treatments / Miranda Vane
You can spell miniscule both ways (see dictionary.com) Right this way, dear < ‘right, this way, dear’ OR ‘right, this way dear’ (unless it is to the right, as in ‘not left’, but i think you mean as in ‘OK then, this way’ Try to ‘tell’ less in the intro. ‘old’ might be ‘grey haired, hobbling’ for example (plus, you already do a good job with ‘skeletal hand’ so it’s a shame to rob your own description with the preceding ‘telling’ Gesturing into < gesturing towards (otherwise sounds like h...
Novel Treatments / Brevity
Semicolon before ‘glass would have shattered’ You switch to ‘I’ – do you mean you are one of the characters here? just seems to switch from omniscient to first personal slightly abruptly. Perhaps begin by making it clearer in the (otherwise excellent) first sentence that you (‘I’) are the narrator, not omniscient. But the ‘I’ also seems in conflict with the idea of it being a surprise of it being a boy having the voice, since it seems to distance your perception from that of the (potentially ...
Short Story / Charlie Don't Surf
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