RinRajani's profile
AGE:
18
LOC: Farwell, MI
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 09
LOC: Farwell, MI
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 09
Hey!
I am Rin, creator of Rin’s Ingenious Online. I am always being inspired. My real name is in fact Ashley Jane, but I go by Rin. I find Rin to be a more powerful name. shrugs I use writing as an escape from my daily life. I am a rather insane person, my beliefs happen to blow people’s mind all out of portion. Ha-ha. Generally if someone thinks they understand what I am saying, they ended up mistaken what I have said. So my social skills suck, fun. I love questioning and answering things people never would think of, and most likely is rather useless. Nonetheless it is still fun. I would be the person who would go to a Wal-mart’s parking lot with a cane and yall “FOOL!” at someone well pointing a cane at them. It fun, inless it’s a…
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Version 1
3 Reviews
1 Comment
I knew it was true; the other cults are completely changing the rules to include abuse to their rituals and beliefs. I lower down to the ground and twist to the other side of the tree; I have to make sure not to be seen. The breeze is stinging my cheeks, but moving will cause more trouble than the fall’s night breeze will to my skin; or health for that matter. I know two main things about Satanism: one, being the cults are branched out in two main sections, Theistic and Atheistic Satani...
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Oh wow! So detailed, I love it! I didn't read beginning until I read this part and was like hmm yah I should probably read the rest of it. Not only because it was amazing but to understand it better. I love all your detail and specifics it made it for the reader can easily flow along with the story, or even feel like they are there. Characters are developed nicely, along with the plot. It was truly excellent I was really reading it for any spelling/grammar issues so if there was any it was no...
Highly amusing story. Your word usage is great! It is not to simple, but it's not so ridilious that it would make a reader stop reading. The story-line is amusing, interesting, entertaining, and makes the reader want to keep reading. This is excellent! I assume your indents just disappear when pasteing the document over... If not you need to fix that. It, also, has a lot of fragment sentences. Some of them are fine to have but quite few of them should be fixed. Example: "Always in the clouds ...
I like the story line. This sounds more like prologue than a chapter though. I recommend that, possibly, put all the background information about the deal in the prologue leading to the court case. Then start the chapter one with the court case. Expand on your ideas a little more, like more detail I suppose. Here some of the mistakes: ~You need to fix the "Mr" to Mr. or change it to Mister. ~"coloured"-colored ~"skin which" - should be change to - skin, which -or- skin that (I think skin that...
Highly amusing story. I love the characters, especially Leo and Pekkan. I mainly like them for their wits, and sarcism. I'm liking the story line so far, it's so amusing that it makes a reader want to keep reading. Only problems were: 1. "I saw the two familiar frat houses that made so much noise, the Irish pub next door, the Indian restaurant and the dingy convenience store." The made so much noise, well are you comparing it to the other places around it or what? Maybe you should go with som...
50.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
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