Secbuzz's profile

I would only say that how could she have "sucessfully managed to avoid confrontation" when she was being pursued by something? Obviously something had tried to confront her. Maybe a better word would be "contact"? It seems like a good start, though.

I think you changed tense here, "Even the little teacup he drunk out of had a smiling Holstein on the front." I think it should be "...he was drinking from had a smiling holstein on the front." "couldn’t see that him using the cream in his coffee-whiskey concoction" an extra "that" made it's way into the sentence there. "Most of the time, Harry turned a deaf ear to Ralphie’s crazy ideas." Then why was Harry glad Ralphie couldn't see him using the creamer? "It was if they moved" Should be "It ...

Very good, I just found a couple mistakes, "...he back was humped from arthritis" Should be "his back was humped from arthritis" Don't let the little errors bother you though, we all miss some somewhere. "The old man knew more than he told him about his fate." This should be in the past tense, "The old man had known more than he had told him about his fate." "He let go of her hand and she took his in hers..." This line is just a bit confusing. You might want to make it something like, "He let...

Very well written and full of feeling! Just a few susgestions: Where you wrote "He is my knight in shining armor, the prince of Cinderella, the Romeo of Juliet." You should maybe change it to "...the Prince of my Cinderella, the Romeo to my Juliet." When you put "my" there, it makes it more personal, and more posessive to you. "He completes me in a way that fills my heart overflowing with love." "Fills" and "Overflowing" don't really go well together here. Maybe it should be "He completes me ...