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Steve4994's profile
AGE:
37
LOC: Raymore, MO
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: August 09
LOC: Raymore, MO
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: August 09
What’s there to tell, I’ve been writing stories as a way to pass the time since High School. If I’m to believe family and friends I’m a good writer, but the cynic in me refuses to believe it. I can’t get past the concept that they may be slightly biased, so that’s why I’m here.
Items
Version 1
7 Reviews
0 Comments
Most people burn their bridges, me, I fucking nuke mine!
Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
I’m afraid that I’m slowly losing my mind. My name is Alexander Murray, and man do I have a story to tell! I mean this tale is most definitely one for the campfires. If someone else told me this whopper I would have ate it up like it was richest chocolate cake, but when it was finished, I would have called the storyteller a liar if he or she said that it was true. But I know it is… I will apologize now in case I ramble on or wander away from the course of this story. I haven’t had much sleep ...
Version 1
6 Reviews
0 Comments
The town of Serenity lay nestled in the valley before us; the lonesome clang of the Blacksmiths hammers the only sound piercing the mid morning air. It had had been a long and dusty trail here after Billy and I got word back in Abilene that our former commanding officer was in trouble. Now, it was never said that a MacKay had ever turned his back on a friend in need, so we went for our horses and lit a shuck back to Missouri. It had been nigh onto seven years since my brother and I had been ...
Version 2
1 Review
0 Comments
A group of corpsmen and some members of the medical staff of M*A*S*H 3496 waited by at the edge of the makeshift landing pad for the helicopter to land. As soon as the wheels touched the ground they rushed to recover the wounded inside, a man in his early forties hopped out the side door to get out of their way. At first glance he looked like an officer, he wore Marine utilities and carried an old .45 automatic strapped to his leg like a gunfighter. He had a Chinese SKS slung over his left s...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
A group of corpsmen and some members of the medical staff of M*A*S*H 3496 waited by at the edge of the makeshift landing pad for the helicopter to land. As soon as the wheels touched the ground they rushed to recover the wounded inside, a man in his early forties hopped out the side door to get out of their way. At first glance he looked like an officer, he wore Marine utilities and carried an old .45 automatic strapped to his leg like a gunfighter. He had a Chinese SKS slung over his left s...
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Reviews
I think you have a very entertaining story here, you had me laughing from the first paragraph. Personally, I think you need to keep the part about Jillian and Mac, the man has got some good insight about men and Love. The feeling I got from Jillian is that the kid behind the counter was lucky the Police were there, otherwise I think she would have leaned over the counter and slapped him. Keep working at it, and I look forward to seeing the finished product. Good luck!
I hate to use the old cliche "It's a good start", but in this case, it is. I wouldn't worry about the format, there are computer programs you can buy that will show exactly what you need to do. This genre has been done before, so you're going to have to find a new twist to really grab a producers attention. That said, I look forward to further installments. One final nugget, don't let anyone discourage you, just keep moving forward. Good luck.
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This is a very entertaining play, I like the audience participation in the third act. The interaction between Shirley and Martha is what pretty much sucked me in, there's nothing funnier than two Old Maids sniping at each other. I have no suggestions to make it better, the play can pretty much stand on it's own two feet. Good luck in bringing it to the stage.
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