I'm about to say something unpopular to males ages 16-28. I DO NOT care about Lindsay Lohan. In fact, I don't even know if I spelled her name right. Furthermore, I'm not even going to check, because if she doesn't spell it that way then I think that's how you should spell it. I don't know who started this, the selection of one person to follow the rest of their lives, but it's flawed. Paris Hilton? She's got money, I get that, but so do so many others who look two times as good and are ten ti...

I'm no conspiracy theorist. In fact, when my brother's dog craps in my room I see it more as a compliment that my room is more spacious and comfortable than I do that she only does it to spite me. I also don't believe in space aliens other than the song title by musician Dan Dyer. I don't have a problem with domestic wiretapping as long as there are court orders that mandate such things be legal. If someone wants to sit in a van or an office and listen to my mediocre phone conversations all d...

Without sounding too much like a gossip columnist, I must ask if the actions taken by ABC towards Grey Anatomy's character Dr. Preston Burke, played by Isaiah Washington, is really all that necessary. If you are unaware of the situation, during a heated discussion with T.R. Knight, a homosexual actor who also stars on G.A., Washington used the word "faggot" in reference to Knight. As a result, ABC is now requiring that Washington "enter a program to examine why he would use such hateful words...

When I was in the 6th grade, I wrote a paper for our drug awareness program called D.A.R.E. I don't remember exactly what I wrote, but I know that it was the best one in my 6th grade class. I remember because I got a t-shirt (which I wish I still had because I was fat in the 6th grade and I'm sure that it would still fit me now) and I had the opportunity to read it in front of half of the school (actually I had no choice). I didn't go to each room and read this to each individual class, I rea...

I was watching TV this afternoon and there was this commercial for a show that will be on the Discovery Times channel sometime this week or next about a bunch of people who attempted to climb Mt. Everest. I obviously don't know if they made it or not because I haven't seen the show. They showed scenes of a guy who was being medically treated on the mountain, and of gusts of snowy winds. I thought about it for a second, maybe half a second. Why in the HECK would you subject yourself to death t...

We learn the theory of relativity at an early age. Most of us hear about it from our high school physics teacher, others of us are lucky enough to be able to wait until college before we skim over it in some half written notes or a book, a book that was never really read. In a world where many things are relative to one another, a lazy eye is in no way relative to the average lazy American, and physiology, or God, is to thank for that. I don’t have a lazy eye, but I have known people that hav...

There are a bunch of songs on the radio this holiday season, but one that has consistently gotten on my nerves after I reached 12 years old is "Grandma Got Ran Over By A Reindeer". Why? Because if they are looking for sympathy, I'm not the one to give it to them. Let me tell you why. The familiar line goes like this: "Grandma got ran over by a reindeer, walking home from our house Christmas Eve...." First of all, don't look for pity from me when it's their fault that their grandma got ran ove...

Every time I have made the comment “I don’t know if I have lived yet,” it is usually connected with some sort of crazy reference, I’m not always serious. That all changed when I saw him on a Thursday night at Buffalo Wild Wings. He rolled in with a tank, oxygen hooked up to his nose, and a confidence that I one day can only hope to experience. He is an older man, around his early seventies, with slicked back gray hair, and a slight slouch to his posture. And he is my new hero. I’ve seen him b...

This is a real random thought because it hasn't happened in a while, but every time I go through a fast food drive thru I get nervous. It's probably happened to everybody at least once. You know when you go through a drive thru and the car in front of you moves up, but doesn't move up a whole lot. You follow, thinking that they're going to keep going because you assume that the car in front of them is already at the pick up window. As it turns out, there is a line back up, but you don't know ...

I sometimes get excited about little things. As much as I hate running out of deodorant, toothpaste, or soap, I also get that excited. Yes, the little things. The joy of picking out a new scent or flavor really pumps me up. Why? Because I don't like monotony, unless of course I find something I really, really like, which is rare, finding a new scent or flavor breaks that up. It reinvigorates me. Kind of like the big word I just used. However, shopping for deodorant can sometimes be a hassle. ...