West's profile

West avatar
AGE: 22
LOC: Mount Vernon, IA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: June 11

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Poetry / Cabernet Franc
Version 2
11 Reviews   0 Comments
When I put you to my lips I’m kissing blueberries and pomegranate. French and delicate, sitting by the cigar box I wonder. If you were a verb it would be glide, you are the softening gentle one, beseeching others with your plum round eccentricities.
Ratings & Rankings
Poetry / Cabernet Franc
Version 1
6 Reviews   3 Comments
When I put you to my lips I’m kissing blueberries and pomegranate. French and delicate, sitting by the cigar box I wonder. If you were a verb It would be glide, you are the softening Gentle one beseaching others With your plum round eccentricities.
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
At the End of the Rainbow The lion roars in the grass and I am a serpant slithering underneath the gazelle jumping wearily through blissfull grass away from the lion’s den. Who knew the sun was blue on mars away from gravity? And that is my imagination. See you sweetly sleeping on the rooftop and I see you for the first time. We are the bug on the yellow flower slowly crawling towards the nub at its end. If we slept in the sun we would be superman. And if we walk across the ocean we would be ...
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Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Sonnet for the Sea Drift wood flows into the rocky cliffs dancing with the waves that crash along the stone facing. Water drips like rain along discarded trash littered upon the sandy shore, and floats endlessly through the wind like lonely memories. An oar, broken from the current begins to warp like the setting sky, and time is forever reaching. The sun yawning a goodbye to the moon's light glimmering. Under the stars a cat stirs to roam along the shore with eyes like sea foam.
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Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Canvas of the Four Seasons Drops of sunshine Falling from the blue Abyss. Sliding through the air At the speed of light and touching The earthy tones below. People Drinking down sips of bottled water and coffee Merrily through the rejoicing speed that increases with Energy. Turning from the splashes of gold to blue with the Increasing rain of the season. Umbrellas peacefully put up over the heads Of lovers inducing dramatic visions of the cosmos directed by the great magnet. Showers of blue w...
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Reviews
Haiku/Senryu / Machine Gunsaku
The second haiku is definately my favorite, it has wonderful imagery. I feel like (and maybe I'm reading it wrong) I can attach a similiar theme to most of the haikus, but not all of them. Like the first four are all basic observations, sort of like a zen haiku (capturing a moment in a breadth). But the last two seem to be of a much larger scale. Aside from the third and fourth haikus the others seem quite political. And the final stanza sits alone with fantasy imagery as its metaphor. So I s...
Flash Fiction / .hamburg
To me this poem is finished, very nice job. I enjoyed the juxtoposition between modern and ancient, exe: "archaic brick, a brilliant wall of electric patterns crackled in cold european night". I like that the lines are short and concise, especially with the dialogue, and ending and how the ending's length contrasts the beginning which is longer. Some images I really liked were: "electric/patterns crackled", "shadowed suits bathed in headlights", "swollen avenues", "rythmic pulses". Once again...
Journal, Diary, & Blogging / A Character Proposition
The characters sound interesting to me. This isn't really my field since I don't have much to do with fantasy topics and I'm heterosexual, but my friends talk about elves and such and the idea does sound like it would be enjoyable to read, and romance is generally good for depth as well, it doesn't really bother me if they are straight or gay. Just be careful to make sure the ideas are yours and everything should be fine.
100.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
Poetry / Finus
I feel like you could be a little less straight forward with this poem. Naturally this poem is about a friend of yours, and your notes say that he is an enigma, so perhaps that is something specific to focus on in the poem, perhaps a story about him would be appropriate.
Flash Fiction / Comeuppance
Removed
50.0% Review Quality (4 Votes)
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