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Wiggin's profile
AGE:
20
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 25
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 25
I’m an 18 year old, married lady who writes for a living but rarely for fun. I tend to wait for incredibly inspiring moments, which don’t come horribly often. I enjoy reading E. E. Cummings, watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and eating strawberry shortcake.
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Version 1
7 Reviews
0 Comments
My self grew in a different place than we Whose neighbors were Always and Wholly A place viewed through rippled cellophane Where the stars laugh and the moon approves If we should visit this place, you and I We wouldn’t wish to come back For the water’s too sweet, the night too bright (Your blood will dance, your heart will shiver) The shimmering streams of this world of perhaps Do not shine from the diamond canopy sky But it glitters from the dreams dropped in Like pennies into a forgott...
Version 1
2 Reviews
0 Comments
I want to understand words and phrases meanings and meaningless observations I want to create permanent ink stains on my hands and to be the cause of permanent stains on people's minds I want to see past, present and future to come together and form life I want substance to become nothing and nothing to prove to be something I want to to earn admiration adoration accusation I want to breathe life into blue and white and to know what it's like to be verbally nude I want to be brave for everyon...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
There you sit with your painted face Batting eyelashes Flashing smile Basking in the poetry of your throat Your collar bone sitting majestically A crown for your milky shoulders Turn your attention to The right Where you'll see a man Falling From where he once was Now invisible To the newspaper carrying Business owners Pouring nothing but Coffee into their Souls Nine to five and the ride home Is Long Silence overlapping into something more And less
Version 1
7 Reviews
0 Comments
It's not me, it's you I awoke to No One laying against me breathing softly, or maybe gently, towards my ear it tickled, and I was cold He always took the blankets shifting, He shifted and elbows and knees wrapped tighter hands clinging, like cellophane just as delicate "we're not forever" I always told Him He said He knew, but He didn't "pass the salt" was His usual answer He doesn't like pepper I washed his socks God, He had so many socks I washed them all, and he still took the blankets any...
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Reviews
I really like the inspiration for this piece. I think it's a neat way to write a poem - to pose a question and then answer it. However, there were quite a few spelling/grammar errors that disturbed the flow of the poem. I highly suggest reading through the piece and fixing these simple mistakes. It will make a huge difference. My other suggestion is to re-think your punctuation. It seems rather sporadic. Sometimes question marks are used, sometimes not. Periods seem random. Again, I think it ...
Overall, I like this piece. My favorite part was the "more clever than me" line, simply because it's grammatically incorrect, which seems to compliment the statement the speaker is making. In the second paragraph, line two, there's a typo - "you" instead of "your". It kind of jolted me out of the flow of the poem...I suggest fixing it. I really like the ending quite a bit. In my opinion, it couldn't have had a better ending!
I really, really liked the basic idea of this poem, and I thought it was executed well. In the very first line there's a little typo that you may want to correct. Good job.
I am, amazingly, left speechless. I found this poem to be breathtaking. From your use of one of my favorite words (molasses) to the absolutely perfect ending, this poem is quite fantastic. Bravo.
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