Zakari39's profile
AGE:
33
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: February 10
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: February 10
Avast!
Mountain climbing Pirate alert!
Hoping to shape my talent (aren’t we all…) into something useful.
Mainly Fantasy – if it doesn’t have one of: Dragons, Sorcery, Warrior-Monks or scary Sea Beasties in it – it’s not good enough!!
Items
Version 1
9 Reviews
11 Comments
Chapter 2 - Discoveries The students sat in the large lecture room, some listening in rapt attentiveness, but most draped over their desks, barely awake. Such were the problems of widening access at Thelorn University, with the capable and the lazy thrown together to fill course quotas. It didn’t help Master Chath’s cause that his subject this afternoon, Comparative History, was a core unit, designed to broaden the education of students who studied a wide array of subjects, both exotic and ba...
Version 1
34 Reviews
30 Comments
Prologue Imperial Date - 693 105 years after the Sundering Many times had the Xa’Charn Mages tried to wipe out the Ghahanian Monks. Barely a Century after the Sundering had first split the Order into its traditional branches of Light and Dark, the Empire was overcome with rebellion as the Mages took to the streets to destroy the Monks, against a general backdrop of resentment that had swept through the rural provinces. The Order of the Spires and the Zanar Assassins had bonded together severa...
Version 1
34 Reviews
24 Comments
Chapter 1 - Rackan Imperial Date - 1881 1293 years after the Sundering Purple and crimson swathes of light suffused the darkening sky, a nightly tableau of wonder out in the wide expanse of the dusty Rackan Plains. The moon shone in diffuse beams, obfuscated by a single cloud, the light filtering the growing dark into a hue of rich colours before true night descended to cloak the earth in encompassing darkness – nature’s ultimate shadow. Motionless, Sorren stood at the edge of the camp, where...
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Reviews
Heh. This made me chuckle. I like the barely controlled anger towards the end - the sugar and toxins in the beverage are clearly affecting your rational thought. The reference to suckling on it like a babe was good - I imagine that's a marketeer's dream of newfound, mindless addiction. This could be good as an aside in a road trip or a story of the travails of life - it's a humourous and light episode, with a darker edge to it.
100.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
'Mrs. Young could have cared less' - what could she have cared less about then? I think this is an Americanism - but to use it in describing an English story would sound wrong. Surely she couldn't care less - else the situation would not be worth comparing! Aside from that - it was a bit too formulaic. Mrs Young did this, then that, and then that and died. The doctor, did this, did that, and sat down. It needs a bit more life to it really. The premise is good - I wonder how the 5 kids will se...
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