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alishia78's profile
AGE:
29
LOC: Longmont, CO
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 18
LOC: Longmont, CO
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 18
I have a lot of love, passion, and stubbornness bottled up inside of myself (alongside all kinds of issues…). I’m pretty mellow (probably boring, these days) on the outside, but my heart and head are full!
I am smart, creative, and fiercely independent. Love red wine. Literature and anyone who can talk about it. Motorcycle rides (I never get those any more). Deep conversations with good friends. Or complete strangers. Swing dancing. Writing… Obsessively.
I tend to write in the heat of emotion, in simple forms. Personal therapy, maybe, but worthy of sharing, I believe. Every voice should be heard.
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Version 1
13 Reviews
0 Comments
How can I say the joy of the pain of my heart, brok en and SWOLLEN big enough to swallow the world ?
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Version 1
2 Reviews
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In 29 years I have lived and died more than once. The woman who gave me birth the first time calls me a cat. I think of myself as phoenix. Out of ash I rise again. ____________________ In love’s name enclosed. Boxed in. They crammed the dirt of their dogma into my head until it came out of my mouth. My heart held strong. With good intention they collared an heirloom guilt around my throat. Pressure. A slow squeeze. They asked what the voice in my heart murmured. Then said my heart screamed li...
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Version 1
4 Reviews
5 Comments
I think of you, Dean Moriarty, And wonder when we'll find each other again. Divine madman and angelic whore - Maniacal grin together with soul's crying. Where are you, Dean? I dream of Mexican jungles, Heavy nights, Drunken philosophy and sublime fuck. I, too, am beat - But, only half-assed without you. Look for me on a curb in Denver Kneeling to cry. Your father is missing, and I can only keep hoping You will find me soon.
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Reviews
Lines that rhyme -- from you? A nice twist on your usual style. Is this new, or have I just missed too much of your new work? Nice images of wanting to simultaneously take in your lover and be inside -- emotional intercourse. Sometimes even better than the sexual variety. It paints a nice picture of desired exchange and intertwining -- physical, mental, and spiritual. Ideal love. Isn't that everyone's wish?
Very nice! I like the imagery of this memoir-poem - reminds me of much beat literature. A concise description of a road trip. My favorite line: "Ten hours of gin rummy..." Could perhaps be expanded into a longer work, with more detail of particular places...
Last 2 lines have too many syllables, so this limerick isn't quite right as far as form goes (it reads a little awkwardly), but funny. I have two kids... catch myself singing kids songs all the time...
I really enjoyed the eroticism of this poem. I agree (somewhat) that the use of so many ellipses can ward off readers strictly because of the form, but I understand why you use them, and they particularly enhance the fluidity of interaction in this piece. LOVE the use of rhyme within the lines -- my favorite 2 are "quiver… shiver she delivers…" and "afflictions… affections… multiple… intense… directions…" The lines just roll off my lips. Yummy...
Very intense for the length - nicely done. I like the first person perspective and the tone he uses (slang "choppers," "the kid," etc.) I think you can play with this a little more to make the character/tone even stronger. Love the narrator's feeling that he'd "done something good" by saying that the choppers were coming... he's not getting that feeling from his job as a medic, by dressing wounds. Great conveyance of hopelessness/futility.
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