I think I would of liked more detail in why you want to bring yourself to cry, just doesn't quite hit the right note for me; like blam, blam, blam paint the scene you want me to see with words? I imagine lightening or war striking, maybe a bomb...but the piece leaves me needing much more...definitely missing something, though there is great means to develop further - use it and mold it some things take years to find and complete! Thanks for sharing, hopew this is enlightening and encouraging ...

I guess all your memnorable azures and emerald blues reflect back to the lake, and I love your frosty descriptions. Thus said I cannot pretend to have grasped the concept behind your meaning/deapth here. I would need commentary or picture here to aid my thought I believe. Keep at it, am sure the right words will come with time.

Very cleverly written, made me smile, could see you tracing your intimate moments together and almost felt like I shouldn't be reading, but then there was a kind of young love/innocence that came over with your words. Critique wise you got me - other than I'd like to read more. One question...were you asking your partners help on the math front? It comes over to the reader that you'd coyly know all too well of multiplication and division, let alone the simpler sides of addition...Good to go i...

Well done, you highlight how it was so very wrong that so many necks were placed on block for wrongs not committed after having been fitted up by some deceiptful soul. Just make sure you spell check your writes, it would be such a shame for such a piece too fall to one side for spelling? Title fits well and draws the reader - well thought out!

Lol. about sums up many, one of those phrases we use timelessly, well done!

Clever, though the mind wonders did you fall in love with the one who left or another?

Makes me think of another 6 worder but I filled my chances, lol. Game of life, take a chance... yours made me think of monoply and board games... or maybe vegas and turning your life around wth a huge win?

okay great start, you could add impact now by describing your pain ... is it a concorde thrusting through your brain or the slapping of butter onto bread? Think up some good comparisons and carry the idea through to your other writes. You could google comparisons, similies and metaphors to help, its how I learnt. I'm all too familiar with pain, its a daily issue to me...a bullet shoots the length of my spine while surgeons carve s into my pelvis either side, pulling veins from within they suc...

Nice picture you paint, for if one were consumed by the pianist you would not notice the coin. Nice one! Good luck.

Not familiar with this type of style, but as I ot into it I found it to work well in this instance. The short verses seem to pick up the speed and anticipation of the wheel as the game goes on... The whole idea of going everywhere for therapies sought, but to turn to gambling is well thought out. Great comparison of the rattling sound of roulette to the train too... Only one small thing that may be intentional to your own style is the punctuation of the shorter stanzas...and yet still you use...