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AGE:
39
LOC: Chicago, IL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: September 17
LOC: Chicago, IL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: September 17
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Version 2
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Somedays (somedays #137) "Einstein said the problem of the now worried him seriously. He explained that the experience of the now means something special for man, something essentially different from the past and the future, but that this important difference does not and cannot occur within physics. That this experience cannot be grasped by science seemed to him a matter of painful but inevitable resignation." - Rudolf Carnap "I am now the most miserable m...
Version 1
7 Reviews
4 Comments
No thing has changed. I typed a needed email. Results won't require genius. Silent spite and Mundane insanity. I try, I fail. I said, "Do not reply." Smack that dim hand. Momma replied. Two times that exact day. Nothing has changed. Claims of 'real care', request For directions specified. What sad hay. Noticed not a dewdrop, tons beside my behest. Simply wants off the hook. Connect the dots. Life-long knee-bends under steepled roofs but She's quite deaf to atonement. Tots Site that target fi...
Version 1
6 Reviews
11 Comments
Truly, 'tis such a Hellish thing to be So easily trashed, disposed of, by those You would have died for happily. They deem Wise Plato's example cavern a rose. In fact, since 'self' is their compass, they go Much deeper still. The dark, 'safety', is all. There they stuff scorched noodles between bones And boulders 'til certain blindness enthralls. Walls do become their entire world. You see, They whimper at the mere idea of challenge, Go fetal to fight off the needs or pleas From all others. ...
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An interesting piece. it is obvious that you have read well and aren't afraid to have a spot of fun with it. 'Byronic-lite' cracked me up. Also appreciated the references to Malthus and philosopher-kings (though Charlie, by definition, would seem to the exact antithesis.) I know therapists in America are obliged to commit their patients if they are convinced they are a threat to themelves but obviously the ethics become hazier in dealing with friends. it might be interesting to have your narr...
50.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
Hmm. i'm really torn here. intensely emotional six words but, i fear, they become hopelessly cliched w/o the explanation about devil's island. when u are working with so few words you have to either twist or layer meanings to evoke interest. could you somehow work the island ref in somehow? 'a voice robbed of all boats' maybe? good luck.
nice piece. loved the image of a nurse w/o training wheels. provoked some interesting images. bit torn about the use of 'bad genes' though. loved the great use of a homonym but it sorta confuses the issue when the main subject, the infant, is all about some of the same genes. why are they bad for narrator? good luck.
Nice one. love causal chains with unexpected hitches. know what you mean too. careful what you dish for, eh? good work.
Excellentpiece. loved the images, especially words arcing to the ground, and the idea of the piece but i must admit the execution left me baffled in places and ultimately muddles the piece. some, i think, must be typos but others left me scratching my head. in the 1st stanza you say 'wombs, rich are barren...' huh? did you mean 'rich or barren'? also, in the second-to-last stanza you put a positive subclause in a negative one. 'sky rising or folding, are..' grammatically speaking that's a big...
50.0% Review Quality (2 Votes)
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