brokeneditor's profile

Originally published in the Broken Inglish Commonwealth & Empire Trumpeter, June 8th, 1944. War Review: D-Day An expert assessment of the developing situation on the front from our man in Normandy, Sir Arthur Cavendish. 'June 6th, 0530 Hours, HMS Fortitudeness - As I was awoken by the first volleys from the guns of the Allies' mighty armada off the coast of Northern France, I heard a clarion call of freedom ringing out to the oppressed peoples of Nazi Europe – and was reminded of my quite cle...

White House Appalled By Pelosi's Sickening Display Of Diplomacy For Bi...Tipton Xamax in Washingon D.C. & Morgan St. Mighty in Damascus The White House last night condemned House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's visit to Syria as a "sickening display" of diplomacy that is "completely at odds" with the Bush Administration's long-standing foreign policy. Pelosi, the third-highest ranking politician in the United States, is in Syria as part of a delegation of high-ranking lawmakers including Democrat Keit...

Jesus Admits Easter Errors - "We missed maximum impact," says Son of God. For Bi...Rogue Ballesteros in Arimathea Jesus Christ of Nazareth, known to millions of followers around the world as the Son of God and one part or other of this Holy Trinity thingy, has admitted for the first time that "serious errors" were made during His death and resurrection over 2,000 years ago. "Basically, Dad thought it would be really effective if I died for the sins of the world, then was resurrected and ascen...

Hungover Journalist Hopes There's No News Today For Bi...Nero Taul in Cheamley Cross. Nixon Mexxes, intrepid on-the-spot reporter for British satellite news channel ActionNewsPunch!, announced this morning that he hopes there is "no news" today, as he is "blitzed" after getting "completely plastered" during an "absolute rager" at last night's Action News Awards. "Christ, I feel rough," a pale and visibly shaking Mexxes told Bi from his desk at ANP! Action News Studios in Cheamley Cross, Londo...

Thwarted Super Villain Rues Length of Missile Countdown For Bi...Tipton Xamax at the Joan Rivers Institute For The Criminally Insane, California. Dr Hans Brakkenhakker, diabolical evil genius and founder of the now defunct KAYOS Foundation, admitted yesterday that he made a "serious error of judgement" when he ordered a five-minute countdown before the launch of his doomsday device, the K-AYOS 1 missile, last week. "I had the vorld in mine hands, it vas all going so vell," Brakkenhakker told ...