That was one of the most entertaining stories I have ever read to be so short! This part made me laugh out loud... "She didn’t want to be tender headed. She imagined this would be a lot easier if she were hard headed, but she didn’t know how to make her head harder." and also the part where Tisha just knew what came after 100, 200, 300... that was great, literally I laughed out loud twice while reading this. Also, I was getting kind of complacent with your story until you went to barb's house...

I liked your poem. Especially this part "heavy steps take him to the fallen man, the fallen man who doesn’t cast a shadow." Great words written there... Overall, I liked the poem, but think it ended to abruptly, would have liked to see the ending expanded a little bit somehow, but if your anything like me, it is hard to revise poetry. But, a few years ago, some changed one of my poems without permission, by changing the name and the ending! I was shocked, until I realised that the new title a...

WOW! What a great poem.. I like this line "As the sun rises the dew holds drops of blood" it jumped out at me on the first page. I like the perspective that this is written from, correct me if I am wrong, but maybe from an Iraqi's viewpoint? I could never write something so complex and especially about such a subject. I agree with your work. Thanks for submitting it for review.

I like it, it is very funny, but I lack the ability to give you advice on structure. I can, however, give you my opinion as a reader of poetry. I gave you a 7 overall rating and would consider seperating some of it to help it read easier. Thanks for allowing me to experience such a beautiful and witty piece.

Were you peeping in my window last night...? :) I am just someone who writes poetry from time to time, but I rather enjoyed your poem. What is the structure or rules for a Haiku poem? My review is from a reader's point of view. Change nothing, in my opinion. I was entertained :)

You are brilliant, I don't see this as a poem, but it is one of the best pieces I have ever read in my life... how original to me and creative. This should be in print somewhere... where I have no idea, but my only critique is that it doesn't seem to come off as poetry. He SIMPLY ran a polyholomicrosampling procedure on himself, took a biochemical analysis using the retropsychoneural gylospection processor, mixed in a bit of leftover ichthyo-orcine fœtal tissue for filler, and popped the con...

"...the only thing Felix knew was that he had an 85% chance of being deported if he missed the kick!" This was the first line that caused me to laugh. You are definitely a story teller... I like football, I like satire, so, I probably like this piece more than mainstream society. However, I would consider taking out the gaping hole in the birth of Timmy, and rewording that part... in my opinion it lowers the overall quality of the work with something that may be too offensive for a woman or a...

I tried to understand the context that the word amenity was used in and based on this definition (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amenity) I could not see how it fits, other than that it rhymes. I liked lines 6 & 7 very much... I would consider rewording line 8, an example would be: Time, where unlimited words are permitted. The contraction "aren't" affects the natural flow in my opinion. In line 12 I suggest changing "as seen" to "is seen". Overall, reads like rap lyrics, great rhyme, some mech...