I like this but for some reason your metaphor in places is not quite there. The whole idea of being settled for comes through but seems a bit muddled under the obscurity. Overall not bad.

Isn't romance itself the sweetest lie. I got the idea of a mutual lie between these two. I really liked the way you did this.

I loved the piece from the imagery to the general flow. The way you laced all of the imagery together was amazing. Good job, keep up the good work!

I love this piece. Its raw but I like it it moves faster like the heart when it is frightened. Your word choice and imagery were top notch!

I really enjoyed this piece. Its sparse but it makes its point well with the imagery. I think you can expand this piece a bit without ruining what you were trying to accomplish.

I really like the simplicity of this. Alot of folks use alot of words in hope of hiding lack of skill. I am a a sucker for the abstract so you got me with this one.

I enjoyed your words but it was hard to hear the music from this cause it didn't flow as well as it could have. I would sing thins through a few times and you'll see what I mean.

I loved this because of the dark abstractness of it. The raw gritty imagery of this drew me in almost imediately. I like how it progressess through the scene like it was nothing.

I can sense the feeling of suffocation and distain for the possesiveness of the boyfriend in this piece. I think it could be expanded abit to give a clearer view but it was good overall.

Overall I liked this piece a lot. I see what you are trying to say but I think you could make it much better if you add a flair of imagination to it. Not to say its unimaginative but I think it could use some spicing up.