djini35's profile

djini35 avatar
AGE: 37
LOC: Killen, AL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 15

Simply put, i love the written word. I am always amazed at how creative the human mind can be. I am from the caribbean and i grew up on grandma’s stories and little poems.

Item Stats
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Items
Poetry / sunrise
Version 8
15 Reviews   0 Comments
dawn comes like an explosion of fire as the sun rises and paints the clouds orange, red and yellow while tiny sparrows litter the morning sky below, the grass lays nestled under its blanket of dew-undisturbed then— a rustle- a stir- signs of life the rooster’s alarm neighbor’s voices floating on the crisp morning air dogs bark and chickens peck freshness fills the air nature whispers its sweet song it is daylight like any other but for this moment it is morning!
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Poetry / Heatwave
Version 8
0 Reviews   0 Comments
The air is thick the heat seems angry it pierces skin like tiny daggers eyes squint and strain to see the distance as shimmering heat dances off the interstate through suburbs where children play in little plastic pools the car's air-conditioner begin to spit needles grass in the median lays dry and brown from thirst roadside trees stand still as if in silent protest the scorching wind brings with it no relief I imagine sitting on the porch-- my shirt unbuttoned sipping on a tall glass of lem...
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Poetry / Gone
Version 4
15 Reviews   4 Comments
Papa's scent still lingers Grasping tightly to his favorite shirt From the darkness, memories come rushing in and I cannot help but think he is in the other room The screendoor rattles at the breeze's touch Just as it would whenever he came home Now memories come to life And I hear him in the kitchen- opening cupboards and hummimg Then I hear mama crying in her bedroom She is asking why he was taken from us so soon Now the memories are a steady trickle And I hear mama laugh and I just know th...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Limericks / To Dad
well at least you rose to your father's challenge. still there is nothing special about this piece and your father should have let you know that the first line was "borrowed" from another body of work.
Locked
This is a wonderful piece for children and it has a nice flow to it. the only thing i think you should consider revising is the word entertain to fit with the flow. You might consider fitting in the word lame. Still great effort.
Children's / The dog and the log
i think this piece is more suited for poetry that a story. i liked it, it was simple and to the point with a nice flow to it and best of all children will get it. in line ten it should be you're and not your. good luck
Novel Treatments / Untitled - Prologue
This should be part of a chapter as it does not make sense on its own. We have nothing to go on except that this character is a upset over an event and thus he turns to drinking. this does not make the ensuing story unique or interesting but rather like any other story. The prologue must be such that it compells the reader to venture further into the novel. Needs more work i think.
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Children's / The Marvin & Molly Show

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