friendliestfire's profile

friendliestfire avatar
AGE: 37
LOC: Cincinnati, OH
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: April 24

Writer aspiring to “be” a writer.  I am better at fiction than non, so short stories are currently my thing.  Unlike most of my peers, I love workshopping stories, my own and others.  
I wish I could have met Henry Miller.  I’m an Aries. I like the band Arcade Fire.
Now let’s go save some babies.

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Short Story / Lucky
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
A nurse comes in every thirty minutes to tell me that I am one lucky so-and-so, and I have often heard—as grating as some simple-minded after-school-special sentiments—that I now have a “second chance at life!” Well, I didn’t feel like I had finished with my first one. I have a previous life that is evidently now over, and I didn’t redeem myself in it, and I never prepared myself for its end, and I’m not sure I’m up to starting a whole new thing now. I’m thirty, I’m a cook, my girlfriend nea...
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / Miles From Bad Axe
Version 1
3 Reviews   0 Comments
Miles from Bad Axe Miles drove West on State Route 142. He was alone on the road, having left Bad Axe an hour early, and he watched out the windows as the cornfields collapsed into melon patches, then the melons burst into a confetti of clover. Michigan’s thumb was green, even as late in the season as the first of August. These were the last of the year’s crops, the stragglers and tenacious bloomers, soon to be harvested and sent to markets or feed lots. Miles Holden was on his way to other p...
Ratings & Rankings
Poetry / poetry
Version 1
4 Reviews   1 Comment
This is why I hate poetry the title tells too much prepare for words or wisdom witless witness all the thesaurusary the many ways to say i feel you need we lost i see i am poetic this is poetry
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / Death of a Line Cook
Version 1
24 Reviews   2 Comments
Box Seats Sports Bar and Grill opened on the Northeast end of Tucson in 1986. Gil and Marylou had followed a dream from Detroit to the Sonoran Desert, where they opened the upscale sports bar, complete with patio and poolroom and two large dining rooms separated by a half wall. The front of the restaurant was all windows and looked out at the rolling and rising foothills of the Catlina Mountains. Box Seats was located at the foot of Mount Lemmon, Tucson’s highest mountain, and one of its most...
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Reviews
I like the beginning of this story, as there is a strange news-report feel to it, and the news is bizarre. I also like "the vetrinarian, and one of the only people in town not waiting to be discovered," though I think this element (of a wanting to be discovered) should play an important part in the rest of the story. The part that I think needs attention in revision is the part where you write "I'm a two year old Dutch Mastiff..." and so on. It is hard to "believe" that the story is being tol...
Locked
Poetry / Superior Race
Your first stanza speaks of an action, something happening, and it sets up an expectation of repercussions. It's a good way to set up a poem. I also like the controversial lure that is your title. But the second stanza, rather than expanding on the action of the first, starts something new and,to be frank, something hard to follow. If read as a sentence, there would be subject/object/verb confusion: "Unable to stop the phobia that attaches itself to the ashes of the nameless will remain in th...
100.0% Review Quality (4 Votes)
Short Story / Camouflage
This sentence is sort of cumbersome: "he irascibly mumbled something incomprehensible." Though the word choices are good, they don't go well together (John Gardner advises to be careful of accidental alliteration) and though this isn't alliteration, literally, it does stand out that both big words begin with "i" and neither is necessary. Why not, "he mumbled irascibly." Mumbling means incomprehensible already. Nice word play here: "...conversations wilted over the salad course..." You keep t...
Poetry / Bumming it back
The language and rhyme scheme(s) here are lovely and engaging as is the imagery and the storyline, itself. I especially like the lines/stanzas: "they’re all black and chill to the bone. You may think me hardy and dauntless, but I’m forging a ticket back home." and "The trains are all chained to the bedposts as drops make white noise on cars’ hoods. Shopping bags play owls who play ghosts, the trees pine away to the woods." And also, "when the clouds were the dew on a stem..." The only "proble...
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Short Story / Unlocking Wes

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