hisredhead's profile

hisredhead avatar
AGE: 24
LAST LOGIN: August 16

I am…
I am still trying to figure that out.  I remember who I once was, but life has changed so quickly.  I am not that girl anymore.  
I am a wife, I am a traveller, I am an artist.  There are many things that I am, but I believe they all fall into those three areas.  Sometimes my soul feels lost in the life I live today.  Until I am found again, I will write.

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Non-fiction / Weekday People
Version 1
2 Reviews   1 Comment
When we were first together we had an epic love. The tale of our romance was truly one for the storybooks. But now, we are different. There has occurred a change in us somewhere in the last two years. I am most aware of this difference on Wednesdays, when he is asleep and I am watching the clock progress toward midnight. Wednesdays are the night I realize I can’t remember the last time we made love. Though as I sit in the living room with my laptop I tend to find it was usually on Sunday. Aft...
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Short Story / Adulteress
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
The rain was cold and it matched my mood. Days like this didn’t happen often in California, but when they did people tend to stay inside; afraid that their silicone may melt away in the water. Jonathan had gone away on business for the weekend. I was all alone again. I felt alone even when he wasn’t gone on business in those days. I was happy to shut myself away from the world and the rain that day. I drew all the curtains shut and lit the house only by candles. The dancing light always seeme...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
3 Reviews   3 Comments
It's strange how I wander around people's pages here how many people I know still hold a flame for their high school years. There are those of us who keep it in our hearts as a fond memory of times with friends that will forever be cherished. There are others who post their prom pictures as if it were yesterday, but it has really been four years since the big night. There are blogs overflowing with high school drama; filled with rumors, backstabbing, and people blaming the world for the frien...
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Short Story / Rock Star
Version 1
4 Reviews   0 Comments
Kylie let the music overcome her. She was flattened against the barriers about two feet from the stage. The band above her was screaming heart breaking emo lyrics out to the crowd. THe club was filled with the musty combination of sweat and smoke from the writhing fans behind her. There were hands groping against her body, somthing that always happened in such circumstances. Yet, she felt so detached from the crowd. "Will you catch me if I fall or will you leae me calling...calling out your n...
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Short Story / Untitled
Version 1
3 Reviews   1 Comment
The beach was quiet, calm, secluded. It was his favorite place and tonight he was sharing it with her. The air was warm coming off the dark ocean, yet she shuddered a bit when a soft breeze hit the two of them. Her skirt billowed softly around her creamy thighs and he yearned to touch the silky skin beneath the thin ivory skirt. She sat between his legs and nestled into him. A whisper of her sweet aroma reached him as the breeze blew once again. He put his arms around her and looked out to se...
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Reviews
Poetry / VISIONS OF YOU
I didn't get any feeling from this poem. The meaning is very clear, but it lacks a moving quality. All I could see while I was reading this was a 15 year old girl reading it in front of her English class. Try to convey more emotion into the piece, make the reader feel what the subject feels. Keep an eye are your rhyme scheme as well, it gets a bit confusing. This is a topic a lot can relate to, just don't forget your reader.
I enjoyed the beginning and the end, but you lost me in the middle. The form is great, I love how it feels to read. You have a great topic here too. Try to expand on the thing the character was wrong about. You seem to not want to name it, but maybe bring in how the person realized and go from there.
Non-fiction / Reasons to Quit Smoking
Locked
Poetry / Thanks giving
I like the second verse. It very vivid and flows well. The first one could use some work though, I stumbled a bit on what you were getting at and what emotions you were trying to convey.
Short Story / A Day to Remember Love
I'm completely exhausted by reading this work. I hate to be so blut, but it seemed to completely lack emotion. When writing a story, you want to pull your reader into the action and emotion of the scene. This just seems like a listing of things you did that day. Paragraphs are very important. They give your reader a place to rest and separate your ideas. I can see potential in your subject and idea, but you need to get a little more creative with the writing to attract readers.
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Non-fiction / 8 Simple Questions

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