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mattbooth1's profile
AGE:
35
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 11
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 11
Items
Version 1
3 Reviews
1 Comment
Serial Working Title: Serial Character Cast: Jared Clark: Serial Killer – Main Character Young Jared: 1 Scene to witness death of mother & kill father Sandra Clark: Jared’s Mother, 1 scene murdered by husband Thomas Clark: Jared’s father, serial killer whom when discovered by wife kills her. Dr Wendy Malone: Criminal Psychologist, Several scenes with Jared in asylum discussing his madness and motives Marcus Terry: Victim 1, 1 Scene killed by Jared, Marcus kills married women and collects thei...
Version 1
6 Reviews
0 Comments
Serial © Matthew Booth 2004-04-14 Script Working Title: Serial Character Cast: Jared Clark: Serial Killer – Main Character Young Jared: 1 Scene to witness death of mother & kill father Sandra Clark: Jared’s Mother, 1 scene murdered by husband Thomas Clark: Jared’s father, serial killer whom when discovered by wife kills her. Dr Wendy Malone: Criminal Psychologist, Several scenes with Jared in asylum discussing his madness and motives Marcus Terry: Victim 1, 1 Scene killed by Jared, Marcus kil...
Version 1
10 Reviews
0 Comments
“Four pints of lager please.” Said the young man at the bar. This was the second round of drinks he had bought for his three friends and he, and Sam the landlord was a bit concerned that if they carried on drinking at this rate they might get a bit too rowdy for his liking. However looking at the four men in front of him he decided that telling them to leave might be easier said than done. The lad who had just ordered the round was not particularly tall, standing just short of six feet, but h...
Version 1
0 Reviews
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I walk down the street, With my head in the clouds, I’m in a busy place, But I don’t notice the crowds, As my mind wanders free, And what should I see, But the face of the girl, Who just walked out on me. Cause I’m thinking of you, But what can I do, You no longer want me, But I still love you, Yes it’s true, I’m still thinking of you. I talk to my friends, But they don’t understand, That I need to be near you, To just hold your hand, You’ve put your mark on my heart, With your loves burning ...
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Reviews
This is the first piece of your work I have rad through, So I am missing some of the context. I will try to go back and read some more to get a better feel for the characters. The piece and plot are interesting I am a big fan of fantasy and have read a lot of good and bad stuff along the way. The trick with fantasy is always to try and find something original. Which from this one small chapter I think may be the case. What I would say is that in the middle of this chapter the text did become ...
OK. I'll start at the beginning. This is the first piece of your work I have read, so if I miss any of the context I'm sorry. From a composition point the piece is well put together and is easy and flowing to a reader. There are a couple of minor grammer issues but I am sure these would be cleaned up in any serious editing process. I'm a big fan of Fantasy Humour and whenever anyone attempts it they will allways be compared to the master Terry Pratchett. With that being said I'm not sure yet ...
For someone of only 15 this is a decent attempt at a song. That being said, you need to put a note in the review guidelines as to what genre of song this is. I am assuming it is somekind of rock/metal but it could just as easily be some dance/trance anthem. It also probably needs another verse to pad it out a bit.
Ok I'll start at the beginning. I get this is film noir and I 'll be honest it took me a while to get past the genre as I think it is nowadays almost comical. I think one too many satires have done the genre damage. Once I was past that though I really did like the uncomplicated familiarity of the characters. Some of the descriptive text you used was great and i could almost see some of the scenes played out in my mind. I do feel you need to flesh this story out a bit more though. The whole r...
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OK, I am marking this a bit low as I think I need to read the whole treatment to give it an accurate scoring. But onto the feedback. Firstly the reference to Python in your intro did help me a lot, I could imagine the old Python ast putting on a show like this. The work itself is by it's very nature chaotic an disjointed, which is fine but I think your layout for it as a script treatment needs work (I know URBIS can limit and distort any formatting you try, but have a nother look at it). You ...
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