Basically this poem is a commentary on the fact that many people blindly follow the belief that America is the greatest country in the world without being able to answer the question, “Why?” Pretty much it comes down to the fact that they believe it because someone else told them it was true, not based on their own experience. In that stanza I personified that with the mascot of Kentucky Fried Chicken as the spokesman for what should be believed.
Poetry / American Religion
Bring out the dead.
Bring you all out
Hollowed on the inside;
Filled from without –
Non-sensical
Non-sequitor aside.
Bask in what you are fed
On the glory of who you are.
Your American Religion,
Steeped in all the mysticism
Colonel Sanders has to offer
In this government of the people.
Buy the people.
For the people?
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Zing! I’ve led myself to believe the strength in this piece rests in a verbal delivery, allowing erratic structure to fall aside- being replaced with a poignant, personal delivery. I enjoyed the last three lines very much, great question mark at the end.
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And all God’s children said, “AMEN”!
I couldn’t agree more with your comment on religion.
Didn’t follow the first two lines.
Picked up with L3,4 and this flowed well until the Colonel got involved. Was this a farce statement meaning ‘no mysticism’. Sorry if I’m a little slow on this one.
Like the play on the word “buy”. think you could come up with a stronger last line however.
8/8/8
“Bask in what you are fed
On the glory of who you are.”
This is a great line, awesome word choice… very powerful and hard hitting. An honest message that most Americans cannot admit. I loved it.
Like my previous review on the other version, I feel that this idea is great. I really liked this structure and flow. Your revisions to punctuation made it a little better, but still, I had no serious problems with the other one.
Excellent read!
i love this poem. very very smart. you are very talented. very brave. this has wow factor, very thought provoking. this will probably piss people off which is good. i think this fantastic. i am sincerely blown away. i have no criticisms. my advise is keep writing and write plenty you have real talent and the cerebral capacity to make it special. i would love to see more of your work. this kind of work inspires people including myself to not just write but really think and move.
Overall, I thought this poem was well concieved and written, but a couple of nitpicky things I noticed detracted a bit from the quality. I get what you were doing with the ending, and the ‘buy’ instead of ‘by’ was an inspired choice, but the last line “For the people?” ended a sharp poem a bit dully if you get my drift. In other words, it felt like a weak way to end things.
One other small thing, the second line “bring you all out” was oddly worded, or at least it didn’t quite sound right in my head. It may just be a problem with my head…
Great poem, bravo!
Nationalism as religion…there’s quite a bit of truth to that. I like the overall feeling of the piece, and some of your grammatical choices are quite excellent. The last two lines really tie the whole thing together.
Solid. Provides no answers, while touching on the surface of the problem. Minimalistic, so it works that there isn’t a solution. I wanted the last line to read “sell the people”, though… take care that the cuteness of the homophone doesn’t detract from the point you’re trying to make.
I understand the point that KFC representing the fastfood industry is the holy grail for Americans. That’s what they’re taking by nose & mouth. What about what they take in thru eyes & ears from thru the electronic idiotboxes? I think you could make a lot more happen with this poem. It’s a great opener but you surely have more, much more.
Excellent. Loved it.
A great, scathing, satirical criticism of American popular culture, with flickers and shades of corporate influence and the horrors and downright immoral nature of advertising.
It really was great, well done!
I haven’t read something as clever as ‘Buy the people/ For the people?’ in too long a time.
I feel like you started out good, but I am having a hard time understanding on what you are say with this stanza----
“Your American Religion,
Steeped in all the mysticism
Colonel Sanders has to offer
In this government of the people.”
beside that I see nothing wrong with this poem—Good Job!
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