Young Adult / E.J. Horowitcz- Vamp Slayer- Chapter Three

Chapter Three
        Adrian and another tall teenage dhampir with brown hair hanging over his eyes were the first two to charge at the beast. The giant wolf-bat creature howled and pushed both of them aside as if they were a couple of rag dolls. Drool dripped from the creature’s fangs as it rushed toward me.
        Dia unsheathed a sword she had strapped around her waist and handed the weapon to me. “You’ll need this more than I shall,” she said as we ran.
        “Thanks. I just wish I k-knew …” No not now. Why does my asthma have to act up now? I doubled over as I wheezed uncontrollably.
        Grandpa Min raced to my side, pushing the beast away with one arm, as he helped me to my feet. “Concentrate Elvis. Your mother had asthma too, but she learned how to heal herself and control it. Breathe boy … Breathe.”
        “N-need m-my …” My fingers trembled as I rummaged through my pocket for my inhaler. Luckily, I managed to find it. Still gripping the sword, I inhaled, but oh crap, the beast must have heard me as I hid behind a large boulder.
        It howled and then barked out in a rough scratchy voice, “Come to me little Elvis Junior. Your mommy and Kali await. Where are you E.J.?” The beast snorted. “I can smell you. You reek of fear. Ah … If you won’t come out, perhaps I’ll tear apart one of your little friends limb from limb.”
        A shot of adrenaline kicked me in the butt when I heard Dia cry out. “E.J., don’t listen to him! Go find your Mum.”
        I didn’t want to call out to Dia directly and alert the beast, but I had to make sure she was okay. I thought about what Adrian had said about telepathy, and shot one thought to the dhampiress. Dia, does that wolf thing have you?
        Yes. I heard her sobbing in my head. Don’t worry about me. You must save yourself and your mother.
        Forget that. I liked Dia enough already that I didn’t want her to be ripped to shreds. I still had the sword in my hand, and stealthily I crept through the shadowy pass with the weapon tight in my grip. I thought I saw something in front of me, but it turned out only to be Grandpa Min stalking the beast with another dhampir. My heart pounded. My palms were so sweaty that I nearly dropped the sword, but at last, I saw a massive shadow with wings looming in the distance.
        Slowly, I crept behind the beast, sword raised high above my head, and then I struck with all the power my skinny arms had, right at the monster’s neck. I winced as the sword cracked through the bones. The monster released Dia as its body slumped to the ground and then the head of the monster rolled away.  The metallic scent of blood and sweaty fur made my stomach churn. I fought back the bile bubbling up inside me because I had to make sure Dia was okay. I raced to her side and helped her to her feet.
        She trembled in my arms. “You saved my life E.J.” I wished, for one second, that I would see such gratitude in Noelle’s eyes as I did in Dia’s soft gaze. “I shan’t soon forget that.”
        Grandpa was soon at our side, clutching a limping Adrian. Grandpa ruffled my hair. “I knew you had it in you. You’re a born slayer, little man.”
        I released Noelle, as my cheeks heated. “It was really nothing. I don’t even know how I did it.”
        Adrian smiled. “You killed Kali’s lycan-bat because you are half-dhampir, half-demon, the one destined to destroy Kali herself.” He glanced at the shadow of the mountain. “Maybe not today, but soon enough you shall. Let’s keep moving. The most important thing to do today is to save your mother.”
        I couldn’t argue with that. Although I still wasn’t too sure about defeating Kali, but I knew I couldn’t let my fear stop me from rescuing Mom. If I stopped what Adrian called a lycan-bat, who knew what else I was capable of?
*
        The moment we stepped into a dank, shadow filled cave, my mother telepathically screamed. E.J., it’s a trap. You must go! She kidnapped your father and I because she wanted you.
        Mom, why didn’t you tell me the truth? What about this prophecy thing? I am the one destined to destroy Kali.
        A strange shiver shot down my spine, when my mother replied, E.J., I’m sorry. I only wanted to protect you. I didn’t even tell Adrian about your bloodline because I knew he would take you to train you. I … I want Kali destroyed, but I don’t want to lose my only son. And how did you learn telepathy so quick?
        Adrian taught me. You should have told me mom. This is my life and I had a right to know the truth.
        I clenched my fist, trudging onward through the cave, wondering how different my life would have been had I known. I might not have even met Danny, Missy, and Noelle. Would I have had dhampir and dhampiress friends? Would everyone still see me as only a geek? Grandpa Min walked beside me. Figuring he might have some answers, I whispered, “Were Mom and Dad ever gonna tell me the truth?”
        Grandpa put his hand on my shoulder. “The truth is that they love you very much. You are just a boy, Elvis. They wanted to protect you, as my own father did with me when I was a lad.”
        “When did you find out that your father was well … different?”
        “I suspected the truth for a long time. My mother, your great-grandmother, loved Vlad and tried many times to explain why he was so cruel to those who disobeyed him. Kali came to my father while he was imprisoned by the Ottoman Empire. He was just a boy, but my mother said she whispered such ideas into his head … driving him insane. She made Vlad what he became and my mother loved him, in spite of it all.”
        “So when did you finally know Great-Grandpa was a vamp?”
        “He came to me, just before I was to be executed in front of the Sibiu Cathedral, stating that I had great power, and could age slower than any other human, but he could make me immortal. I was frightened and …”
        “So you let him turn you from dhampir into a full vamp?” I backed away from him. “Are you like … Would you ever …”
        Grandpa Min shook his head. “Not all vampires are like Kali, the self-proclaimed Goddess vampire I feed from animals and on occasion sneak into hospital blood banks.”
        Rubbing my neck, I replied, “That’s good to know. So how much father to where my Mom is?”
         Mom replied before grandpa could. E.J. if  you move a few more feet closer, you are grounded for life! Do not come around that corner, son.  You ask Adrian to teleport you home!
        “Never mind,” I replied with a small laugh. “I have a feeling we’re close.”
        I felt Dia’s cute little accent invade my mind. We’re nearly there E.J., I can sense your mother.
        I turned and smiled at Dia. I know. She just told me she’d ground me for the rest of my life if I came any further. She seems to think this whole thing is a trap. I think if we can find her, we’ll teleport away before that vamp witch queen gets us.
        Dia clutched my hand, and something told me I had made a friend for life. At least, I hoped so.
        When we rounded the corner, and I caught site of my mother chained to the wall, it was hard to believe that the woman in the torn Sponge Bob Pajamas, with her bruised face, tearstained cheeks, and long tangled red hair was a powerful immortal sorceress. Immortal sorceresses should look so scared and defeated. I had to race to her to hug her tight.
        I closed my eyes as hot tears streamed down my face. “Mom, thank goodness—”
        “Elvis Junior … the one destined to defeat me,” a creepy voice hissed.
        Cold hands wrapped around my throat. The putrid stench of bile and death filled my lung. For a second, I could breathe … couldn’t move. I didn’t see Kali, but I knew she was there, choking me, squeezing the life out of me.
        Before my eyes, the image of my mother faded. Fury overtook my senses when I realized that Kali had tricked me. Rage unlike anything I had ever known filled me to the core. I shook and trembled while the unseen vampiress still tried to keep her chokehold on me, but I sensed her losing her grip. And then I blacked out. I wouldn’t know what happened to me at that moment until later, but even then somehow I knew I did something to hurt Kali, something to defend myself against her dark power.

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LexiLane avatar General Friend

May 27, 2008

LexiLane

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DrChaos avatar General Friend

May 20, 2008

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ethanchrist avatar General Stranger

May 07, 2008

ethanchrist

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ethanchrist reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

You did a pretty good job creating the characters and its believable that E.J. is a typical teenager.  However, your story lacks the details to make its setting seem believable.  First of all, it’s really hard to imagine what a wolf-bat creature looks like, so you might want to describe that a little better and then the general setting needs more description too.  All we know is that they’re in the forest and then a cave.  In order to make this world more believable you need to make it more vivid as well.

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MargueriteArotin

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