Yeah, this piece does need a lot of work still, it’s just finding the time, propper frame of mind and a significant amount of solitude. thanks for stopping to read and for the pointers.
Journal, Diary, & Blogging / lonely days
Hello. who are you? Quite the question to ask someone you’ve just met. My eyebrow rises in spite of myself. It is a bit of a loaded question to ask somone who’s name you’re not even sure of. Perhaps they are nearer to a chameleon in nature, shifting their visage and changing stance with the surrounding company. Maybe the image is not entirely clear… or a little to clear for comfort…? You never really know. Such a simple seeming question and yet…
Well, the sun continues moving across the sky in it’s natural course, and the world and all it’s people seem to be moving at a speed the like of which I am currently incapable of matching. I sit quietly by comfortable on the wayside and watch the goings on from a distance. My heart only mildly heavy as one I love draws farther from me and others seem intent on moving nearer than they should- only pushing me farther away in the process. In the end it hurts them more and thereby kills me. Ah well- life goes on. Wounds becomes scars and scars fade eventually, being only the healing mark of the wounds incurred.
Strange how we accustom ourselves to taking whatever comes, and then choose what we do with it. I have chosen to learn, to move forward- spite of blocks or holes thrown into my path, and yet there are time we all fall short are there not? What with the anniversary of Jacob’s death drawing so uncomfortably near I may just fall apart a little bit, but I’ll pick myself up again and keep moving on- sometimes apace with the warp-speed world surrounding me. Then at others… well, at others just a bit more slowly. The point is the journey, and I’m taking it now from this day on, by my own terms. Determination is a wonderous thing. I think I’ve found mine now- Thanks to all.
There may come more later but for now I burry myself in a game and hope for the night to come on swift wings and soothe my soul a bit.
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Introspective. I like how you say others drawing closer makes you push yourself away from them. I think that’s very understandable.
‘I sit quietly by, comfortable..wayside, and watch’
’...and yet there are times we all fall short, are there not?’
‘whose name you’re not..’
I loved the pondering over what a loaded question ‘who are you’ is.
I like how you illustrate you feel like a heavy pebble in a river, swept partially with the flow, but never quite at the same speed.
I wondered a bit who Jacob was, though I think it’s implied that he was either a close friend or family member, and thus doesn’t have to be explained.
Overall, nice and thoughtful. Well done.
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okay… i think you are trying to “out-style” this piece. simplify it, sentences are confusing and need more structure to clarify your intentions. spelling and grammar are key.
was the initial question ever answered.. who are you?
this is very raw, keep working on this, don’t give up.
First paragraph: Really draws my interest. I like the metaphorical mention of the Chameleon myself. I wonder how often we do such things? PS – you put two lines in between the first two paragraphs, but only one between the next. May want to choose one or the other. Makes it look neater.
The rest is very nice. It kind of goes on a bit, but considering what kind of matter this is for journals, it is not unwanted. You write very well, and you have some good ideas I’d like to see in further description. Keep it up!
kept my attention. interesting subject good observations. very true.
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