Poetry / Capital Eyes (Analysis)

A hard piece. I like it. You have force inside, so the next time for positive feelings, I hope. Is the meaning of the last verse: Too afraid…? I understand so. I think that you needn’t bars nor points after every verse. Just the last question sign.

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May 19, 2008

by discordia

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No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
0	50.0% (12 votes)	100.0%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
19	F	Tucson, AZ	May 27

yes thats a typo i meant too…youre right about the period and bars…ill keep that in mind and I will try and find a positive piece in one of my journals!

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“Why live when you could die?/” This line jumps out at me the most. This piece is beautifully written! I am sure that most of us have seen this phase, so many people can relate to the words of your poem. Kudos!

I feel like I wanted this to be longer. It feels more like lyrics but I liked your delivery.
-Noxema

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May 18, 2008

by discordia

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No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
0	50.0% (12 votes)	100.0%

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19	F	Tucson, AZ	May 27

true, i probably couldve added a stanza or two. thanks for the review!

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I think this piece needs some depth and direction and something to offer the audience that comes from the Poets understanding of his or her environ.

I can identify with this poem from the first line thru the last. It is very well written and the point comes screaming across from “I’m through with this love shit”. As stated in the “notes for reviewer” the writer is obviously in fit of fury and that is not lost on the words though they are few. Great job

That was amazing!
Spastic emotional writing such as this is the best form.
There’s so much emotion in this I can feel it.
I can relate to this so much.
The ability to cause the reader to feel emotion and relate to a piece takes talent.
You’ve got it.

A typo—”To” instead of “Too”. That said my response to this poem is “Right on” and “Been there, done that”. My sentiments exactly, what can I say?  This is a poem that is easy to relate to.  I lift my glass to you and hope I don’t smash it and cut my wrists.  

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May 18, 2008

by discordia

personal info reviewer stats

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
0	50.0% (12 votes)	100.0%

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
19	F	Tucson, AZ	May 27

i would of never noticed the to and too…thanks for pointing it out…thanks for the review!

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