Humor/Satire / American Business

The mind is unable to recall every fact one has heard over time, and this useless fact rose to the top of my mind as I thought quickly of what to tell these two business-types sitting across the table from me.

Every question previous to this one had been simple. The entire interview had seemed utterly pointless; like something you could do over the phone. The formality seemed even more ridiculous. Why wear a suit to a ten minute round of mundane questions? Yet I played the system like everyone I knew had recommended. I wore the required attire and played the part of ‘applicant’ rather convincingly, as if I truly were the ‘average citizen’ that all the posters screamed of.

Sometiems when one distracts himself, one is able to recall information more easily. Perhaps I should study my interviewers? Too simple, but it is a start. Two seemingly identical men in two identical chairs, identical cuts of suit: ‘corporate casual brown’ double breasted jackets and matching trousers. Military-issue (or so one might describe them) cut with the simplest of razors. Their eyes were vastly different, however. The one on the left had sharp grey eyes which seemed to pierce one’s soul. The one on the right had softer, kinder brown eyes almost matching his attire perfectly. Perhaps this one difference was meant to register one of the men as a bastard version of ‘good cop’ and the other as the ‘bad cop?’

Oh God… I’ve caught their eyes. They must think I am stalling! Why must one piece of information allude me at this moment? Why do I always put myself in these predicaments? I must remember to make notes of all the important details and bring them with me if I ever attempt another one of these damnedable interviews.

“We would like you to answer now,” said the harsh one on the left.

“We are only asking you what your middle name is,” the kind one on the right trailed off.

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eagerlot avatar Random Review

June 05, 2008

eagerlot

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
eagerlot reviewed Version 2 - Read 100% of the Item

Everyone can relate to this and that’s what makes it funny.  It would be better to me if there was more dialogue, but I understand that it’s meant to just trace the interviewee’s thoughts.  I’m just looking for a little more life…maybe work on the setting more and make us feel like we’re in the chair pondering our answer.

Noburo avatar General Stranger

May 23, 2008

Noburo

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
Noburo reviewed Version 2 - Read 100% of the Item

I was wondering what caused this piece to be listed as humor until I got to the very end. It is a perfect surprise ending which caught me totally off guard. The way you lead up to it made me think it was just one of the usual diatribes against businesspeople, I was starting to lose interest and get irritated when I was hit with the last line, PERFECT execution.

Spelling error: 3rd paragraph, 1st word “sometiems”.

Brynn avatar General Stranger

May 22, 2008

Brynn

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
Brynn reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

Haha, well isnt that the truth. Stupid job interviews. Ugh. LOVED the snappy ending, good line.

Suggestions:

“utterly pointless like”semi colon after pointless.

“reccomended.” Its recommended.

“simple. but” comma not period.

“or razors.” OF razors?

Maybe the last line would read better “We only asked you what your middle name is.”

Other than that, well done! lol Dont we all hate those interviews. Good blurb for a business magazine or some sort. Good job, cant wait to read more.

Eve

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titanicbrittanic avatar

titanicbrittanic

Age: 18
Loc: Amherst, VA
Gen: M
Last Login: November 17
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