Poetry / No Second Chance

There came a shout, the day war broke out, I trembled at the  dreaded hour, I remember too the  fear, the day so clear, when milk went sour. Across the fields a chilling wind blew but there was more to come, when from deep inside Mother Earth the sound of a harrowing drum. The  neat beat was not of feet, but a warning sent from high, of shattered lives and limbs, sadly men pledged to die. What price we pay for this strip of cherished flag, this love , this passion for freedom, my friend? It has I think everything to do with, where free we stand  in the end. But cast a look around the land, slide on horse  behind St George and use your sword of steel , kill Dragon but of course. Then men were men, they still must needs be so, for good, hope and glory afore we die or go. All men love a dream, amen to that I say. Start now on it today. Today. Then tomorrow means future less by one; lives whirled away at speed.  Reflect exactly how we might have won with one, one more deed. Amen.

The end

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wordwan avatar General Friend

June 17, 2008

wordwan

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wordwan reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

I like this. I dunno if anybody else will, but I feel your theme approach unique.

Thank you.

Heather
wordwan

guild avatar General Friend

June 12, 2008

guild

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guild reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

I really like this poem and the way that you approached war itself. It’s descriptive words of days gone by, was what I loved most. Also, incorporating the St. George flag into the poem, gave the person reading this a sense of the geography or, who was involved in this war.

Everyone who goes into war and pledges their life, knows the chances that they take and the life they might lose. You put in into perspective very well with your poem. Lives given, freedom’s reward and each person paved the way for us.

I wouldn’t change anything with this poem, (except check your coma placements).

You’re a wonderful writer!

Take care..
Rhonda

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Cleveland

Age: 63
Loc: United Kingdom
Gen: M
Last Login: November 05
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