Romance / I Do -- Or Do I? (Analysis)
She feels the push to move forward, not look back, and to heal. People tell her to “get on with life”, or “Pull your socks up”, or “Stiff upper lip, girl”. Of course, she knows that they only mean well, and are all friends and/or family that know and love her dearly. That is the problem, sometimes, as she tends to wear her heart on her sleeve and give it away much too easily.
The only desire for her entire life, has been to be married, sealed together for all eternity, to a respectful, honoring, spiritual, thoughtful, generous, couth, loyal, protecting, lover.
Nine qualities, in all is what it would take to make her feel complete. Was that too much to ask?
First quality is Respect, as in full of respect for the sanctity of marriage, and all that it entails.
Secondly, Honour, for she knows that one must earn respect, but can be honoured by their spouse, and return it, no matter what mood he or she is in.
Thirdly, Thoughtfulness, because unless one thinks before acting and speaking, words can escape one’s lips like an eager prisoner, looking for a crack in the wall. Then the same words can cut like a knife, slashing through love, as if a murderer were in their midst.
Fourth, but only for the purpose of this list, is Generosity. When we are generous then only can we be worthy of a mate, for we are agreeable to give and do anything to bring happiness to the one we love, and who loves us.
Fifth, would be the quality of being Couth, which in her mind, actually should be the first quality, because no one wishes to be embarrassed in public, nor when in relative private, yet within eye or earshot of others.
Sixth, is Loyalty to one’s spouse, marriage, self, and family. This she describes as never, even for a moment, leaving the side in one’s mind of the other. It means being allies, and working towards agreement, or at least, compromise.
Seventh, she lists as the Protector, the important title of a provider, the member of the household who “brings home the bacon”, “pays the bills”, provides loved family and the home with everything required to live a bit better than hand-to-mouth. She does not believe in living only pay cheque to pay cheque, never able to plan for fun, nor have a nest egg, to prepare for when grief strikes.
Eighth, would be the fine quality of knowing how to be a great lover! Which, of course, refers to physical pleasure, but also must go hand-in-hand with deepest honor, respect, and faith, so as not to overtake, threaten, nor lead to inequality under the watchful eye of God.
Last but not least, by any means, is the ninth quality, Spirituality, for unless one can be living in a way to be able to open one’s mind to the urging of the Holy Spirit, one cannot possibly contain adequate strength. In an increasingly difficult world chalk full of wonders like technology and science, there comes more facility, as well, to slip down the slippery slope, fall into a pit, or cave in to stresses. Even the best marriages are vulnerable to situations that threaten separation and divorce, unless both husband and wife are on a close faith-walk. She says that it matters not who is further ahead on that walk, only that at times we slow down enough for the other to catch up or pass us. We must be vigilant, aware, and sensitive to where each is in regards to the other, so that we be not misdirected, mislead, nor lost.
She looks for this attachment, although she always has before, and it has never lasted.
This time she knows that it has to be forever…..so how can she choose the right man, or “just know” when it is the perfect connection for her and him?
She needs to “Let Go and Let God”, easy enough words to quote, but much more difficult to heed.
Prayer, humbly on her knees, facing her betrothed, should allow them both the answer, and this she knows and believes with all her heart. Even this scarred, deformed heart, yes the very same one, will be able, at long last, to discern between what is “her” will and “his” will, and then, most importantly, what is “HIS”.
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I think that piece is what alot of people want in a marriage. I liked it, it was simple to read, and easy to understand. I’d like to read more of your stuff. :-)
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