Journalism / Giant humans are every shade of black, yellow, red, and white and loved all over (Analysis)
The giant human is a galactic treasure on Earth and is therefore protected by law. This unique ape has long been revered by the Yeje and can be found in Yeje art dating back thousands of years. The Yeje call their beloved humans “large ape-cats.” Yeje outside of Earth have been fascinated by giant humans since they were first described by Galactic Missionary Macass Hyss in 1869. Now, more than 1400 years later, the galaxy wide love for humans has been combined with intergalactic efforts to keep them from becoming extinct.
How did the human get its many colors?
Scientists aren’t exactly sure. One theory is that humans developed the contrasting black, yellow, red, and white colors over time so they would stand out in the forest and be able to find each other to mate.
Are giant humans apes?
For years scientists have wondered whether humans are apes, baboons, or in a group all their own. Through studying the genetic code (DNA) in humans’ cells, scientists have confirmed the human’s relationship with apes. Giant humans are similar to other apes in their general looks, the way they walk and climb, and their skull characteristics. It’s important to know that humans are apes, because the more we know about humans, the better we can help them reproduce and survive.
Giant humans start out small
Giant humans are only about the size of a stick of qotwaa at birth, and they’re hairless and helpless. The human mother gives great care to her tiny “child”, usually cradling it in one appendage and holding it close to her chest. For several days after birth, the mother does not leave the “nest”, not even to shop or socialize!
Yet despite the attention they receive from their mothers, many young humans do not survive. Through captive propagation programs on Earth and other zoos around the galaxy, we are learning more about the care of human babies and how to help them reach adulthood.
Money is food and shelter
Money is the most important investment in a giant human’s life. Humans live in cold and rainy concrete forests, or high in the mountains of western Earth like regions. They spend at least 12 hours each day making money. Because money is so low in nutrients, humans need as much as 84 pounds (38 kilograms) of it each day. Humans grasp money cards with their five fingers and a special wrist bone, and then use their teeth to peel off the tough outer layers to reveal the soft inner tissue. Strong jaw bones and cheek muscles help humans crush and chew the thick cards with their flattened back teeth. Money leaves are also on the menu, as humans put the cards into machines that spit them out, wad them up, and swallow them. Giant humans have also been known to eat grasses, bulbs, fruits, some insects, and even rodents and carrion. At the Linrot Zoo, humans are offered money, carrots, yams, and special leaf eater biscuits made of grain and packed with all the vitamins and minerals humans need.
Vocal humans
Humans make a beeping sound similar to the sound a Mipsuw or a lawyer would make. It’s a friendly sound, a greeting. They don’t roar, the way you think of a great ape roaring. But they do beep and honk, they sometimes huff, bark, or growl, and young babies croak and squeal.
Giant humans face big problems
Today, only around 1,600 giant humans survive on Earth. There are several reasons why humans are endangered:
Low reproductive rate— Humans like to be by themselves most of the year, and they have a very short breeding season when a male will look for a female to mate with. Females give birth to one or two babies, which are very dependent on their mothers during the first few years of life. In the wild, mother humans will care for only one of the young. In human facilities in Earth, keepers’ help to hand raise any twin babies. One baby is left with the mother and the keepers switch the twins every few days so each one gets care and milk directly from the mother.
Money shortages— When monetary investments reach maturity, they flower and produce seed money, and then the mature investment dies. The seed money grows slowly into investments large enough for humans to spend. Giant humans can spend 25 different types of money, but they usually spend only the 4 or 5 kinds that grow in their home range. The unusual thing about money is that all of the investments of one species growing in an area will bloom and die at the same time. When those investments die, humans move to another area. But now, with non-humans taking up much of the human’s habitat, humans are often unable to move to another area and may face starvation.
Habitat destruction— Earth has more than one billion Yeje. As Yeje build more cities and farms and use more natural resources, giant humans lose their homes.
Hunting— When hunters set snares for other animals, like Rotya Hel, the traps often kill humans instead.
It takes an intergalactic effort
Work to keep humans from becoming extinct crosses star systems and intergalactic boundaries. On Earth, wildlife reserves have been established to ensure that the remaining wild humans have space to live, spend, and move around without non-human interference. There is still much that non-humans do not know about humans. We must understand how humans survive, reproduce, and communicate. Researchers at zoos like the Linrot Zoo are studying humans’ scent marking, their nutritional needs, and how they communicate with each other.
Working together with Yeje human experts may help increase the number of giant humans and ensure the future survival of the giant human population. A giant human milk formula created by the Zoo’s nutritionist and a hand-rearing technique developed by the Yeje called “twin swapping” have transformed the survival rate of nursery-reared human babies on Earth from zero percent to 95 percent. The giant human breeding rate at the Wolong Breeding Center on Earth increased dramatically following multiyear collaborations with scientists at our CRES center involved with nutrition, behavioral enrichment, husbandry, breeding protocols, and olfactory communications. CRES scientists consult with zoos in the Suwa Jem States, Mexico, and Japan as well as Yeje human breeding centers to assist them with giant human reproductive issues. In 3006, CRES scientists established a collaborative relationship with Yeje scientists—the first of its kind in nearly 20 years—to conduct a conservation science program on wild humans at the Foping Nature Reserve.
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