Poetry / This New Age Obsession
funny how technology can be used
to torment ones heart.
me, internet junkie.
sits and waits for your screenname
to return from being away.
it seems it never will.
i think you leave it there to haunt me.
to remind me that you are close (cyber sense)
but will never be close enough to touch (human sense)
i sit here
and read your away message…
(even though it’s a default)
i think that kills me more.
not knowing why you are away.
...but wait…
you have returned!
but returned from where?
(probably from inside her)
look at how horrible this is making me!
i know you will not talk to me.
and i refuse to talk to you.
so i will sit here
with my heart in my stomach
and my tears
stuck in my throat…
i pray inside
just sign off
sign off please
so i can move my eyes
away from your name
and focus on the blurry screen
in front of me.
it never happens.
there you stand.
and here i sit.
feeling your footsteps
on my heart.
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New Age Obsession, as a title?
develop some imagery, like description of your keyboard, monitor, desk?
Condense those lines about him/her returning from her…those are your best lines. Spooky.
Any way of describing yourself, him, or her?
heart in stomach, and tears in throat kind of weak…
maybe blood in stomach and sweat in cheeks…just a suggestion
writing poetry about the computer age is very hard…I’ve tried to deal with it for the past 15 years and I suck, but you have a great start…just condense your lines into even stanzas and develop imagery.
blessings, Gregory
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