Lyrics / :*(onfusion

My dreams are never reality
Though I wish hard for them to be
That would end this brutality
That has consumed all of me
As confused as the riddle I ask
I wander around in a daze
All the time trying to mask
That I am trapped in a maze

CHORUS:
Confusion! It lives inside me!
Every thought of every day
Just dreaming to go away
Confusion! It lives inside me!
Why cant i see all i feel
Why cant i feel what is real

I’m trying to take all of my shots
All in the dark and far away
I try to confront the problem
With the question of Why
Not at all to trouble em
But only so I don’t cry

CHORUS

The questions I ask of the rain
Ones like “why do we die ?”
“Why do you bring pain ?”
“Why do we cry ?”
All in order to understand
What life has to give
The answer I can’t stand
That life is only to live
Have I lived a past life ?
‘Cuz I’m not living this one
Walking on a double-edged knife
Careful not to run

CHORUS

Living barely within the rules
And for that I cry
Good and evil in me duels
And the blood on my hands is dry
A feeling in me that I’ve been jipped
Dealt a fixed hand
My wings unwillingly clipped
All justice for me is banned

Confusion kills me! Rips me! Beats me!
Confusion keeps me! Haunts me! Hurts me!
Confusion lulls me! Lives me! Loves me!

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yang avatar General Stranger

August 24, 2008

yang

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yang reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item
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dieslowdammit avatar General Stranger

August 18, 2008

dieslowdammit

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dieslowdammit reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

I get the message, believe me I do, but I’ve never been much of a fan of abstract lyrics unless the use of metaphorical imagery is heavy. I can’t say that for this peice. It’s not bad by any means, just not really my flavor.

DrChaos avatar General Stranger

August 17, 2008

DrChaos

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DrChaos reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

I like this for the most part.

These lines didn’t work for me:
“Walking on a double-edged knife
Careful not to run”

Not sure what to suggest to improve, though I get your point.

Also in this:
“All justice for me is banned”

Maybe replace “All justice” with “Freedom” ?

Hope this helps!

hey_sean avatar General Stranger

August 12, 2008

hey_sean

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hey_sean reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

The first verse has an excellent rhythm to it.

Then I got to the chorus.
The first half isn’t too bad.
The second half is where you lost me.

The second verse seems like it was just a filler.
I do this sometimes as well, where you start off with a solid idea, then you kinda lose it as it gets spread thin over the song.

The beginning of the third verse/bridge seems to keep on just filling until it gets to the second half when things get stronger. From here it induced a wondering in me. I especially like the follow-up line, “Careful not to run.” I think it played well off the previous line.

The third/fourth verse is my favorite out of the whole song. It’s the most solid, declarative, and has the best imagery. Very good job. Only thing I suggest is dropping the word “is” from the fourth line, as to keep the rhythm that you had already set from the line before.

Depending on how the ending is done would make or break it, so I’ll leave it uncommented.

The thing I really didn’t care for was the chorus. It seems bland compared to the rest of the song which, overall, seemed great. It’s just the repetition of that one bland piece that would sink it in my opinion.

Ctoyboy3 avatar General Stranger

August 02, 2008

Ctoyboy3

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Ctoyboy3 reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

i really didn’t find it amusing… good song though.. i can see some one like arial black or Atryu singing this

cooljim102055 avatar General Stranger

July 18, 2008

cooljim102055

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cooljim102055 reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

hi there,

well it’s nice to see some real song structure, and songwriting craftsmanship in a lyric, with your v/c/v/c and consistent rhyming pattern throughout,(not to mention it’s a GOOD lyric without the “f” word, with all the blood and violence etc.) i’m not old fashion or a prude but i appreciate a good clean song..and you wrote one,nice,nice,job..:)..jim

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lostthunder avatar

lostthunder

Age: 26
Loc: Wichita Falls, TX
Gen: M
Last Login: August 22
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Version 1
Latest Activity: 5 days ago

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