Novel Treatments / In the Hearts of Men - Ch 14

Chapter 14
In the Light of Day
Johnson sent Blake back to Gatlin, a letter in his hand to Sheriff Dawson. Johnson was demanding the capture and hanging of Jeremiah Burns, and any accomplices, for the death of Jacob Sabor, as well as the arson of the Mercantile which killed Sariah, Miss Granger, Mrs. Cromwell and Delilah. He also was demanding an investigation into Mayor Smelting’s dealings with his father, insisting that the bargain they had made must have been illegal.
There had been a brief funeral for Jacob at the Wren’s Nest cemetery, which Regina seemed in a daze through. She had cried as the coffin was placed in the ground, but her tears were silent and forelorn, and when the hole was filled with the earth, she turned around and walked back to the Inn, letting the bitter cold of winter buffet her face. She said nothing, and indicated that she not be spoken to.
Johnson kept a silent vigil over Regina, who was in a state of overwhelmed mourning. She seemed depressed and despondent, unresponsive to most everyone except Elijah and Mama. Her eyes had lost their glimmer and shine. She let Mama brush her hair and braid it into plaits, and dressed mechanically into whatever clothing was set out for her, usually by Felicia, who had begun stopping by first thing in the morning to check on Regina. Regina was grateful deep down for the care she had received from her good friends, but couldn’t seem to get herself motivated enough even to thank them. She hoped that they knew without her saying so.
Elijah took his meals with Felicia, the two of them growing closer. Regina watched them together, happy for them that they had found each other. Felicia was a good woman for her brother, she had decided, knowing that they would compliment each other’s personalities.
Regina had not resumed her housekeeping lessons with the ladies from Wren’s Nest. She just couldn’t seem to get motivated enough to go out into the cold winter air. And the ladies seemed to know. They brought her trinkets, sweets, tea. She smiled thinly, thanked them for their hospitality.
Regina wouldn’t go back to the room that she had shared with Elijah after Jacob’s passing there, so was moved into a tiny room next to Johnson’s that couldn’t hold much more than the bed. Johnson made it his mission to make sure she arose from bed everyday and that she ate something. He would gently pull her into his room where he shared meals with Regina, sitting at a small writing desk together. He was patient, cutting her food for her, feeding her bites when she sat for long periods without moving. He told her what was happening in Wren’s Nest, that Elijah had sent for Charlie and Rachel and their new baby, and that they would be arriving soon. Regina’s face actually registered happiness for a split second at this news, but just as quickly settled back into the brooding sadness that had overtaken it since Jacob’s death.
Regina’s responsiveness started gradually to improve, her demeanor a little lighter, and she smiled a little more often. She still spoke in subdued tones, but had begun asking about the townspeople, Elijah and Felicia. She had even taken to braiding her own hair. After a nearly four weeks of allowing quiet mourning for Regina, Johnson decided to tell Regina of his plans for their travel to Harrisburg, a town not too much further away from Wren’s Nest, where some of his mother’s family still lived.
“They’ll be quite helpful when the baby comes, Regina,” he began softly, putting a hand over hers as they sat eating dinner together. Regina looked up at him, her golden eyes scared and sad.
“What am I going to do?” she asked, tears springing to her eyes suddenly. Regina thought about how ostracized she would be, a young Negro-Indian girl raising a half white baby, all alone. Now that it had been verbalized, the realization scared her. She knew that she was light skinned, her features more delicate than most dark Negroes, and that she might even pass for the Cherokee that Moses Heston had been hoping for, but a single woman having a baby by herself was a bad thing for any young girl, no matter what color she was.
Johnson saw the fright in her eyes as she weighed her prospects in her head, and cleared his throat. He suddenly looked like the shy young man that Regina had first met, recalling suddenly his clumsy kiss so long ago now. The last time he had kissed her, he had been so much more bold, more grown up. He was 20 now, a man with a future, no longer under the whims of his father.
“Regina, you know that I’ve been in love with you for a long time,” he began, not looking into her eyes. He stared at his plate, watching the butter on the potatoes congeal. “I would like to marry you. I know that you’re still hurting from Jacob’s death, and I know that you’ve been through so much that you may not trust me completely, but please believe me, I just want you to be happy and safe, and I care about what happens to that baby. It is part of me, too, even though I am not the baby’s father, I’m still blood.”
He stopped talking for a moment, seeming to catch his emotions before they spilled, then went on again.
“You will have a hard time of life, raising up a baby on your own, a single woman. I can offer you help, and as good a life as possible. You’ve been bribed by so many people, Regina, and that’s not what I’m trying to do here, believe me. You may never learn to love me the same, and I’m ok with that. I just want you to think about it, ok?”
He looked up and caught her eye finally as he said the final words, “I love you.” She cried hearing them, knowing that he loved her, knowing he meant no harm.
“I believe you, Johnson,” she whispered through her tears, “and I appreciate your offer. And, considering the circumstances, I accept.”
He smiled, bittersweet. She hadn’t returned the words, I love you, but she accepted his offer of marriage. That would do for now. He stood and came around the table to her, dropping to his knees before her and taking her hands in his. They were both crying now, and his chin quivered as he asked her again.
“Regina Riddick, will you be my wife?”
She smiled, the first happy smile she had graced him with in over a week, and said simply, “Yes.”
He reached up and kissed her. It was the first time they had kissed since they had arrived at Wren’s Nest, since the night they left the Mercantile. It was a tender kiss, full of longing that was finally fulfilled. His tongue split through her lips and teeth, finding her tongue, saying Thank you, I want you, I love you. He reached one hand up to behind her neck, caressing as his kiss became deeper. She responded to him, her hands clinging to his shoulders. He stood up, bringing her with him, and picked her up. He walked to the bed and laid her upon it, nestling himself against her. His right hand was behind her head, pulling her mouth to him, his left hand on her waist squeezing softly with the slight intensity that said what he wanted.
“I want to make love to you, but I’ll wait,” he whispered into her mouth, his ragged breathing betraying him.
“Thank you for being so patient with me, and for giving me a choice,” she whispered back, looking deep into his blue eyes. He kissed her again, more ferverently. His mouth moved down her neck, nibbling, sending shivers down her spine. She clung to him, threw herself into the abandonment of letting him love her. She knew he would always take care of her, knew that even though she carried his father’s baby, he would never hold that against her. And she did love him, too, had loved him for letting her heal, had loved him for accepting the circumstances as they were. It wasn’t the deep, passionate love that she had shared with Jacob, and it wasn’t the intense, dizzying passion that Moses had overwhelmed her with. It was a friendship that mingled into attraction, and acceptance. And, that might be the best kind of love, she thought as she looked into his eyes.
Johnson seemed to check himself and brought his actions under control, then laid beside her with his arms wrapped protectively around her, Regina’s head on his chest.
“I want to you to marry me tomorrow.”
She smiled dreamily and chuckled under her breath. “How?”
“The preacher at the church here, Pastor James, said he would perform the ceremony, if you said yes,” Johnson mumbled sheepishly, the words stumbling from him.
“Alright,” Regina said, smiling again.
They finally dozed off in each other’s arms. Johnson was happy to finally have the woman he had wanted. The woman his father had taken so selfishly for his own. The outcome could have been so different, if Jacob hadn’t turned her away in his jealous refusal to accept another man’s baby. Regina would have been Jacob’s wife, not his. The realization made him all the more grateful. It bothered him not at all to know so many details of Regina’s experience with his father, and with Jacob. He knew that she had been manipulated by his father, knew that she had loved Jacob. But Regina had been used, had been confused by feelings that were difficult for her to comprehend, overwhelmed by the choices put in front of her that were never really fair.
No, Johnson wasn’t upset by Regina’s past. It only made him love her more, and want to protect her.