Poetry / Raindrops

Remember that night?
When we stood outside

Laughing?

Raindrops wetting your hair—
Cascading down your cheeks,
Clinging to your eyelashes.

Squint and blink.

They lost their grip.

You licked them from your lips
mmm, liquid lemon drops,

and we laughed.

I kissed those lemon drops
From your lips;
you kissed them away from mine.

I shivered against you
soaked to the core in my pink pajamas:

“You’re so beautiful, ”
you said. And I smiled

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dangeroos avatar General Stranger

August 13, 2006

dangeroos

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dangeroos reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

there was a point in time in your life where you experienced this, and I was there. I don’t mean that in a creepy way but your imagery has left me with this romantic scene in my head that will not soon be forgotten. A moment in time you caputred perfectly! thank you.

Deleted User avatar

February 05, 2006

Deleted User

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote )
Review of Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

i loved how you depicted the imagry of this piece. the description is absolutely perfect. the flow is kept upbeat and does not change. the tempo thought changes towards the bottom which makes this almost perfect. it is heart warming and lovely. nice job and i hope to read more.

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dreasappho avatar

dreasappho

Age: 25
Loc: United States
Gen: F
Last Login: July 04
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Latest Activity: over 2 years ago

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