Poetry / Six Word Memoir (Analysis)

Intelligent but untrue v.s. Intelligent but true.
I have never looked in the mirror for inspiration yet someone told me once regarding my paintings, that I am painting myself over and over again…interesting concept.
I have to score you high for the underlying, thought provoking message here.

and what will be seen there? :)

Interesting, but fails to make its intentions known.

I could take this statement in a million different directions.  As far as a short phrase goes, this states a lot.  My immediate thought was, “What was this person thinking when they wrote this line?”  That would obviously explain a lot. When one looks in the mirror, one can see many different things.  Physical features, but more specifically I believe that people see certain things inside of themselves.  Perhaps personal issues, deficiencies, insecurities, et cetera.  I liked this phrase, it conjured a lot of imagery in only a short amount of words.
Cheers.

I must admit I don’t really get it. To me it doesn’t seem to fit the brief of “your life as a writer” as it is quite impersonal and does not really seem to tell us anything individual about your life or your creative process. I could be missing the point and as always this is only one persons opinion.

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August 11, 2008

by crstarlette

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I shake my fist at you!

August 12, 2008

by WanderingVerse

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Sorry didn’t mean to course offence.
Tom

August 12, 2008

by crstarlette

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it’s a joke homie.  say whatever you want.  who shakes fists at people?  

August 13, 2008

by WanderingVerse

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You by the sounds of things :) You’ll be biting your thumb at me next.
Take care,
  Tom

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If this is supposed to be about your creative life (and that was the ‘challenge’) then this approach leaves much to be desired.  I think you mean it to be clever, but it’s not.  You’re Everywo/man?  Why should I believe that?  What motivates you?  The same as me?  I seriously doubt that.  Aside from the lack of clarity and precision, this is also a cliche in other contexts, thus further weakening whatever thrust you intend.  Find a way to articulate what is unique to your experience as an artist and rely on vivid, fresh language.

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August 10, 2008

by crstarlette

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Cliche – yes.  I think it is very egotistical of you to think that you are unique in any way other than perhaps the particular mixture of not-at-all-unique traits.  To use a food metaphor, perhaps your recipe is unique, but the ingredients used to make it are definitely not.  You are just a mixture of things that can be found elsewhere if you look at enough people.  It is definitely cliche, but if you look around at all the pop stars and crappy music  you will see – people like cliche.

August 10, 2008

by ParticoRomulus

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I agree that my ‘ingredients’ are not unique, but there’s a hell of a difference between chicken tikka massala and a grilled chicken special at McDonald’s.  Anyway, I never said I was ‘unique’, I said you should find what’s ‘unique to your experience’, which is not egocentric.    I was talking about you!  Otherwise I said in essence that you’re creative stew is almost certainly different than mine, even if we do happen to use some of the same ingredients (and there is a great variety of those as well.)  Thus, the ‘mirror’ means little to me in relation to your creative life.  You’ve essentially revealed nothing to me other than the obvious…  ”I write to better know myself.”  So do I, and so what?  ”Salt is an important ingredient in many dishes.”  So what?  Tell me something about you I can’t know without the recipe.

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another memoir I have stumbled on this evening , that sounds as if it has a multi meaning involved with it..

coming from a writer ,, it has to be a metaphor ..
so  I will say go with it , and ride with the wind my friend

Lookingbeyond

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August 10, 2008

by crstarlette

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If you feel like it you can read the review by Willow_Wren and my comment to Ctoyboy3 for meaning clarification.  Otherwise, enjoy your wind ride. :)

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It is awesome that I can feel the distain from just six words, so nice job relaying a feeling.  I would play with the spacing, because the words are so sparce.

something like

Just go
       look
    in the mirror.

something to give the words some more power, this says a lot while saying nothing.  like it.

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August 09, 2008

by crstarlette

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Glad you like it and thank you.  I think I would prefer to leave it free of breaks so that people don’t pause when they read it.  I want it to sound like “Well, it’s so simple.  Just …”  Thank you for the suggestion though.  I appreciate it and your time and thought.  :)

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Fantastic!  It says so much in six words…it has everything – humor, disgust, boredom…I absolutely love this.  I know it’s a “bad” review in that I can’t critique it…but really,  I wouldn’t change a word.  Best one I’ve read yet…just as I was starting to think I needed to leave this site.

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August 07, 2008

by crstarlette

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Thank you so much!  I’ll come back and read your review again whenever I’m in a bad mood. :)  AND we have the same name, almost.  Mine has a y.  I’m gonna pretend there’s an apostrophe between the n and the s on your username.  

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This made me laugh after a moment of confusion. So if one looks in the mirror one can see the writing of a lifetime revealed in one’s face. Clever. Cynical somehow as it addresses others but not the author actually, it’s more of a command than a personal 6 word memoir of his or her own life. But I like it.

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August 03, 2008

by crstarlette

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Somehow hearing about you laughing made me laugh too.  Also, I think your profile pic looks like a penis with a face :)

August 03, 2008

by Willow_Wren

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LOL! Thank you, you’ve made my day! :)

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