Poetry / Medusa, as herself

She can no longer deny their unrelenting presence
the silent, writhing serpents circling her head,
paying silent homage to all that was,
all that is,
all that one day will be
Omniscient to they alone since their first days
ruling this temple of flesh.
Through the silence a voice cries out
into the darkness into which praying people pray,
They will not dissolve.
They cannot divide.
This is my penance.
Yet some days when she is strong enough to believe,
though her mind assures her that
providence does not exist,
she hopes that for today
the snakes in her head cannot hurt her
and the dark, moving, hissing crown of thorns
she wears is enough to scare the demons away.

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Reviews

June 18, 2006

mymonsterischic

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
61	89.5% (19 votes)	31.2%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
21	F	Fort Worth, TX	December 16

mymonsterischic reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I see no problem whatsoever with your punctuation/line breaks, but you might want to utilize a little bit of capitalization at the beginnings of a line, or when you are starting a new thought, just to clarify. I actually truly love this poem, it reminds me of some other poetry I have read about Helen of Troy, from contrasting views. Um. Once I remember who wrote it, I’ll totally let you know.

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February 08, 2006

mikelkpoet

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
5	50.0% (2 votes)	13.0%

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Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
52			June 24

mikelkpoet reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

not my thing. i quit reading it about a third of the way through. i like more direct writing. good luck with it tho…i am not the beginning and ending of your readership.

www.185cool.com/mikelkpoet