Crime, Thrillers & Mystery / Windows to the Soul
September 24, 2008
Susanna Einstein, Literary Agent
LJK Literary Management
708 Third Avenue
16th Floor
New York, NY 10017
Dear Ms. Einstein:
Can a man survive a childhood of horrendous abuse to find the love of his life, and finally live a normal life? What happens when that picture-perfect life is suddenly shattered by kidnapping, torture, incest, and attempted murder?
These questions are answered in my crime/mystery novel, Windows to the Soul, set in present day New York. Within a span of two weeks, the character goes from being a newlywed, to being a captive that is tortured and has his death planned, down to the minutest detail. A detective on the case soon realizes that tightly held family secrets hold the key to the rescue of the missing man.
I have attached the first chapter as per your request. The completed novel is available for your review upon request. Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.
Cordially,
SJ Vance, author
PO Box 566
Fort Cobb, OK 73038
405-668-0845
Sjvance57@yahoo.com
Prologue
The man drifted in and out of vivid nightmares. His bed was hard, making it impossible to rest. An attempt to touch his wife beside him, for comfort, resulted in his hand meeting empty air. The searing pain in his head turned to a persistent pounding that instantly cleared the fog in his brain as he jerked awake. Instinctively, he moved his hands upward to cradle his aching head, but stopped midway; there were handcuffs and chains shackling him. He looked at the cuffs in disbelief, fear and panic quickly took over his thoughts. “Where am I?” he asked aloud as he began looking around the cold dark room. He began to jerk at the cuffs, frantic to free himself. His legs were also cuffed at the ankles, restricting his movement. He was lying on a cold cement floor. He maneuvered his way closer to the wall and placed his feet against it, and pulled against the cuffs. His muscles strained against the cuffs, to no avail. He reached up to push his hair back out of his face and his hands met something sticky. Dried and fresh blood covered his hands.
“No! What is happening, where am I!” He tried to calm himself, to clear his head and comprehend his surroundings. “God, what...?” praying was impossible; his mind was reeling in an attempt to rationalize what was happening. “Just stay calm...stay calm. Why am I here?” He heard a noise beside him. When he turned his head toward the sound, nausea and dizziness hit him like a tidal wave, his body wretched repeatedly as he gasped for air.
Someone had put a plate of food beside him and a rat was headed for it. Once it reached the plate and started sniffing at the food, huge cockroaches ran from it and darted into the dark corners of the room. Another wave of nausea hit. This time he had to force himself to breathe deep and calm down. His head began to swim and he feared losing consciousness again.
“Oh my God! Is this real?” He slowly looked around him again, lifting the cuffs to eye level and trying to pull his hands out of them. There was no use in trying; the cuffs were tight. His captor had made sure there was nothing close to him that he could use to pick the locks.
Lying back again, he concentrated intently on trying to relax each muscle in his body. Pinpointing where his pain originated was difficult, as it seemed to travel from head to toe. The right side of his body ached from exposure to the cold cement floor. Once he felt that he’d become as relaxed as possible, he could tell the most extreme pain was from his right knee, shoulder, and the back of his head. The cuffs were biting into his wrists and ankles.
“Concentrate! Find the way out of here. There has to be some way, there IS some way, THINK!” The thought of his wife entered his mind. She would be worried, she would be wondering why he had not come home. How long had he been here: hours, days?
“God, please help me. Help me get out of here, show me the way.” He was exhausted from his efforts to escape the cuffs.
He tried to take in his surroundings, raising himself to rest on his right elbow. A small window cast a faint light into the room, allowing him to see that the room seemed to be a basement. Behind him was the bare cement wall where the chains were bolted. Ahead of him, old shelves stuffed full of junk, and old tires stacked along the right hand wall. The wall to the left had wooden stairs leading to somewhere out of his vision. He tried to lift himself into a sitting position, which he found impossible. He lay back and closed his eyes against the invading pain.
He was suddenly aware of a figure standing over him. Before he could fully comprehend the dark form, he felt a vicious kick connect with his ribcage. He grabbed at his side as the air escaped his lungs. The dark form laughed as it ascended the stairs and slammed a door behind it.
Chapter One
“Okay, listen. I’ve already told you that I’m a detective assigned to a case in this building. If you will give me two fucking seconds, I will show you my I.D.” Detective Steven Johnson was having a problem fishing his I.D. out of his wrinkled pants.
“Please keep your hands where I can see them!”
Before the security guard could go berserk and shoot him, he flipped his wallet out to prove he was whom he said. Unfortunately, the security guard was skeptical, even with the identification.
Detective Johnson was quickly losing his patience with the security guard. It was now 9:00 p.m. and he had already put in a full day at the station before his Captain called to meet him at the upscale apartment building.
Johnson waited in the lobby while the wanna-be officer called the apartment upstairs to check out his story. He was feeling very out of place in the luxury of this building. The high-end furnishings in the lobby were but a small indication of the money flowing from the pockets of its inhabitants. He had to admit since he transferred from the Bronx, that he had wanted to see the inside of 15 Central Park West. He was not disappointed.
“Okay Detective Johnson, I’ve cleared you.”
“Oh? I’m so relieved! I wouldn’t want you to let some pretend cop in here or something,” Johnson said.
“It’s okay Terrance, he’s with me,” Johnson turned to see his Captain barreling down the hallway toward them. Terrance, the security officer, gave him a last scathing look and walked away. Johnson returned the look.
“He’s new Steven, cut him a break,” his Captain said.
“He’s an idiot,” Johnson replied.
“Sorry to drag you out, I know you’re beat.” Billings motioned for the detective to follow, and they headed down the hallway toward the elevators.
”Steven, this young man went missing early this morning,” Captain Billings said. ”Twenty-six years of age, six-foot, dark hair, Italian, name is Julian Giovanni. His wife said he left around 4:30 a.m., his normal time to run before he goes to work. Usually runs for one hour, then back for a quick shower before heading out.” The Captain stopped and turned to look Johnson in the eye. There was a tense look on the Captain’s face. He suddenly looked a lot older than Johnson remembered.
“This kid has lots of friends in high places Steven, so let’s get this thing solved fast,” he said. They continued walking as the Captain relayed known facts about the case. ”Not a single sign of him anywhere, vehicle is still in the parking garage. Security is pulling the camera tapes as we speak.” Steven watched as his superior huffed and waddled his way down the hallway. His almost baldhead was covered with sweat beads that gleamed like raindrops under the hallway lights.
”Head’s up,” Billings said. ”The missing man’s wife and in-laws are here, and so is Mayor Costa and Judge Keefdon.”
”Costa and Keefdon? What are they doing here?” Johnson asked. Although he would bet his life that Costa was here for the press value, he did not see the need for Keefdon’s presence. Keefdon was the worst judge to deal with in the county. Fair, but extremely anal-retentive. Going to his chambers for a warrant signature without the t’s crossed meant being thrown out on your ass. He was notorious for his sternness in court and any defense attorney would cringe when seeing his name appear on anything to do with their case.
“Both are pretty close to the Giovanni’s, I hear. Mayor Costa arrived earlier this evening. We already have an investigative team combing the building and his apartment. Costa felt it might comfort the family to see we are on top of things. We’re going to be watched closely by the public and media on this one,” Billings said.
The two men arrived at the penthouse apartment door where two uniformed officers stood post. Johnson had been in wealthy homes before, but was still impressed with the penthouse. The front door entered into a huge living room with brilliantly shined, dark, wooden floors and leather furniture. To the back of the living room, the dining area with floor to ceiling glass looked out onto the most amazing view of New York City that Johnson could remember seeing. He tried to imagine the view at night; the city lights could make even this filthy city look beautiful.
The right side of the living area held a marble fireplace, inside, a cozy crackling fire. The mantel was massive with a large painting hanging above it and several smaller, silver framed pictures on the mantelpiece itself. The large painting, Johnson would later find out, was the home and grounds of the original, 1800’s, Giovanni estate in Sicily. At a distance, the smaller pictures looked to be portraits of various people. Johnson headed left to where the investigative team members gathered evidence.
He found himself in the master bedroom. The team members busied themselves with bagging hair samples from Giovanni’s hairbrush and packing up the home computer. The room was huge with black wooden floors and the furniture all matched the floor color. A huge dresser, two chests, and a massive bed were placed around the room. A big armoire discretely held a flat screen television and music system. Johnson was again impressed. Being a New York City cop didn’t usually lead to scenes as extravagant as what he saw here. Being a cop also didn’t pay anywhere close annually to what this apartment cost each month. Captain Billings soon entered the room to join Johnson.
The open his and her walk-in closets appeared to be larger than Johnson’s entire apartment. The “his” side housed Italian suits and shoes and every color of shirt you could think of, with matching ties. There were casual clothes here and there, but the fancy suits far outnumbered them. A glassed in jewelry case held Rolex watches, diamond rings, tie bars and cuff links, among other miscellaneous and very expensive jewelry.
The “her” closet had twice as many shoes as the "his" side, he couldn’t believe his eyes. Clothes lined the walls: evening gowns, dresses, cashmere sweaters, silk robes, designer jeans, and a massive amount of clothing. There were clothes with tags still on them, never worn. Purses, sunglasses, Prada, Vera Wang, Donna Karen and designers that Johnson had never heard of hung in this closet. The “her” glassed in jewelry case was packed full of beautiful pieces of jewelry.
Detective Sonora Gomez broke off from the forensic group that was finishing their final sweep and approached the two men.
“Find anything Sonora?” Captain Billings asked.
“Nothing,” she said peeling off her latex gloves. “No signs of a struggle, no blood anywhere in the building. We did get the missing man’s prints and DNA in case you need it for identification purposes. We also have permission from the wife to take both computers in to see if anything shows up there.”
“Okay, thanks. I don’t know why you guys were already called in, but I appreciate your help.”
“The order came down from the man himself,” Sonora said. “Mayor Costa must know something we don’t huh?”
“Election year, remember? A high profile case like this one is just what he needs to stick his nose into to get free press. If this were Joe Blow missing, he wouldn’t bother. Same goes for our honorable Judge out there. He kissed some mighty rich ass to get where he is,” Johnson said.
The team had also scanned the rest of the penthouse. Three guest bedrooms with private baths, kitchen, and an office, where another computer had been packed up.
”Captain, how does someone so young have so much?” Johnson asked.
“Old money, Steven. Old, Italian money,” Billings answered.
”Billings! Where are those security tapes? Have you found anything yet?” Judge Keefdon barked as the Captain and Johnson re-entered the living area. The Judge was leaning against the fireplace mantel, his left hand planted firmly on his hip, and a frown knitted his heavy black eyebrows together. His black handlebar mustache danced as he spoke but not one hair on his perfectly coiffed head moved out of place.
“No, sir,” Billings answered. ”I mean, we haven’t viewed the security tapes yet, they are being loaded now.” Although Billings was speaking to the Judge, he was looking at the Mayor who looked back disapprovingly at hearing the answer.
”What about you, Johnson? Are you investigating or standing around with your head up your ass?” Keefdon said.
“I arrived ten minutes ago Judge. Captain Billings has been filling me in on…,” he said.
“I don’t care what he is filling you in on! This kid means a lot to his family and to this community and I want the entire police force dedicated, one hundred percent, to finding him as quickly as possible!” Keefdon’s veins stood out on his neck and forehead now. One particular blue shaded one zigzagged from the right side of his forehead to the left temple. Johnson found himself staring at it while the Judge’s rant went on. It seemed to pulsate with each word the Judge screamed out, pulsating away from his forehead, reaching for Johnson. ”Hello? Are you two listening to me?” the Judge said. Johnson snapped back to reality and averted his eyes from the Judge.
“Yes your honor, we are listening,” Billings sighed.
Johnson walked over to the mantle to scan the family pictures. He immediately recognized the face of the missing young man. The judge had been right about how much Julian Giovanni meant to this community. Giovanni had established four inner city youth centers, with the help of his church, in the past four years and was directly responsible for helping troubled teens and gang members change their lives and become contributing members of society. Many former gang members now actively worked with Giovanni to help more members escape their dangerous lifestyles. Judge Keefdon had sent many a troubled teen to Giovanni for help.
The face staring back at him from the picture was not only stunningly handsome, but had a kind look in his eyes that would draw anyone into conversation. A confident look with a softness that let you know he had something important to say that he felt could change your life. Not a typical “Christian” look, his hair was long and jet black, tanned olive skin and the most amazing blue eyes, the color of a turquoise ocean on a clear, sunny day. The smile displayed brilliant white, perfectly aligned teeth. Johnson had never seen anyone, male or female, so striking in all his life. Probably all plastic surgery, he thought to himself.
”Steven, the family is waiting for us here,” Billings said, breaking him from his train of thought. Johnson looked around the room to find the Mayor and Judge saying their goodbye’s to the Giovanni family that had gathered on the sofa.
Mayor Costa then walked toward Billings and Johnson. “Men, I trust you will do everything within your power to find Julian? Please call my office if there is any new information or if there is anything that I can do to help move the investigation along. This young man has to be found quickly, and alive. Do everything within your power to see that happens.” After receiving assurance from Captain Billings that he would keep him informed, the mayor and judge left the penthouse.
The two men walked over to the family, Johnson introduced himself to the group and let them know how sorry he felt to meet in such circumstances, but there were a few questions to ask.
Julian’s wife, Allicia was a beautiful young woman. Twenty-four, shoulder length dark brown hair, huge brown eyes that filled with tears that would not stop flowing. Her small hands fidgeted with a handkerchief, visibly soaked with her tears. Her impressive diamond ring caught the light as she twisted the handkerchief.
“Something has happened to him, I know it. Why hasn’t someone called to let us know something?” she cried into the handkerchief. Beside her on the couch sat her parents, Jim and Kathe Warren. Kathe held her daughter close and tried her best to comfort Allicia.
“Mrs. Giovanni, is there any reason that your husband would have left of his own accord?” Steven asked. Allicia stared up at him with a questioning look on her face.
“What do you mean?” she asked
“Is there any reason for him to leave, maybe you have been arguing or he is under a lot of pressure? Could it be possible that he is seeing someone else and may have decided to leave?”
“No! There is no reason for him to leave me. We love each other and spend every moment together that we can. He left this morning and I haven’t seen him or heard a word from him, can’t you understand that?” she said.
“This is totally uncalled for!” Jim stood up from the couch. His wife put her hand on his arm and pulled him gently back onto the couch.
“Jim, he has to ask these questions. He doesn’t know Julian, I’m sure there are procedures to follow when something like this happens,” she said.
“That is correct. I certainly don’t mean to imply anything about your husband Mrs. Giovanni. We have calls such as this all the time and, at times, the husband simply left the home. We will investigate every possible avenue in this case.”
“Detective Johnson, my son-in-law is a Christian man. He has strong morals and beliefs and is not the type to betray his wife. I realize that you have never met, but everyone that knows Julian knows he is a very loyal person. Loyal to his wife, his work, and his God. The possibility that he is having an affair and has left my daughter is not the avenue that needs to be investigated, I assure you,” Jim said.
How many times had Johnson heard those same words from the family of a man that was found in the Bahamas with some young, gorgeous girlfriend? He couldn’t count. He knew he would definitely look into the possibility, but for now, he would try to calm the family.
“Yes, of course, my apologies. What about Julian’s family, does he have siblings?”
“One, his twin sister. She is on the way here now with her husband. His parents were killed in an accident when he was ten. He was in the vehicle with them and was severely injured. He spent almost three months in the hospital. No other siblings. His grandfather lives in Italy where he has two uncles and their families also,” Jim offered. “But no other family in the states.”
Questioning the family was brief, the in-laws were in for a visit from North Dakota, and Julian planned to take his father-in-law with him to the main center office after his morning run. His cell phone never left his side and numerous calls and messages had gone unanswered. They were distraught to the point where Johnson instantly knew they had nothing to do with the disappearance. Any seasoned detective could tell, with being on this job for long, when someone was lying. He saw genuine fear and uncertainty in their faces and heard it in their voices.
”May I ask how your husband support’s himself?” Johnson asked.
”My husband is from a very wealthy family Detective Johnson. We have no money worries,” she answered.
“Is there anyone in his past, or now, who would want to harm Mr. Giovanni that you are aware of?”
”I do remember him talking about a man that was causing some problems. I think his last name was Stewart. I can’t remember his first, but as far as I know, his harassment stopped several months ago. Julian and I married only eight months ago, so I know it’s been almost that long,” she said.
”And what was the nature of Stewart’s problem with your husband?” Johnson asked.
“His son entered the program at one of the youth centers and I guess that Stewart wasn’t too happy about it. Judge Keefdon and the court sometimes allow the children the choice of going to the program or entering the juvenile system. Usually this is done when child services have already taken custody from the parents, which was the case with their son, but he was still very upset,” she said.
”What are you thinking Detective Johnson? Do you think someone like that has something to do with Julian’s disappearance?” Kathe asked.
“It is simply a starting point for the investigation, ma’am.” Kidnapping is another possibility that we must consider due to the financial resources Mr. Giovanni has. We have agents on the way now that will tap into your phone lines in case you receive a call saying that he’s been kidnapped. If this is the case, the F.B.I. will be taking over,” he said.
The private elevator door to the penthouse opened at that moment, a small, dark haired woman bolted in, and grabbed Allicia and they cried together. A moment later, a tall thin man hurried in after her. ”Jim, any news?” the man asked. This, Johnson soon found out, was Julian’s twin sister, Jillian, and her husband Terry, “T.J.”
“Nothing,” Jim answered as the two men embraced. Questioning Jillian and T.J. proved to be time consuming. They would both break down periodically and it took time for them to compose themselves and continue. Jillian gave Johnson a few more names to look into. One, the family of a boy who had left the center and been killed, several parents upset that their children had been taken away, and Bobby Stewart.
After getting what information they could from the family, Johnson and Billings made their way to the security office on the first floor. Here they met with Officer Rogers who guided them through the security process for the building. The office scheduled one officer that patrolled the lobby, one that patrolled the inside of the building, and one officer that stayed in a locked room and watched the twenty cameras placed throughout the inside and outside of the building. The doors leading into the lobby were locked after 9:00 p.m., and opened only to tenants or those cleared by the person they were visiting. The security was in place 24/7.
Is this S.O.P. Officer Rogers, or has this been implemented with Giovanni’s disappearance?” Johnson asked.
“Standard operating procedures, Detective. This procedure was implemented in 1998,” Rogers said.
“Isn’t this all a bit extreme, even for this building?” Johnson asked.
“We have two retired government officials, one prominent record publisher, and many wealthy people who value the security provided here. In fact, Mr. Giovanni has had two stalkers since moving in. Our tenant’s safety and security are of great importance, and believe me, they pay well for the peace of mind,” Rogers said.
“Yes, I’m sure they do. What about the stalkers, do you have names on them?” Johnson asked as he wondered why the family had neglected to mention them.
“I can get that information for you Detective. They have both been incarcerated and I believe the latest is still in. He has had no other contact from the first that I am aware of. “
“What kind of tenant is Mr. Giovanni?” Johnson asked.
“He is quiet, friendly, seems to be a very good man. He’s never caused any problems here,” Rogers said.
“What about his social life, before he married? Did he bring many women here?”
“Not many. He had a girlfriend for almost two years and he brought her here a few times. Mr. Giovanni was much too busy with the centers to date much, which is why he broke up with Kerstyn. He just didn’t have the time to dedicate to a relationship.”
“You seem to know a lot about Mr. Giovanni’s personal life Officer Rogers,” Johnson remarked.
“We talked some. I had asked him why I hadn’t seen Miss Kerstyn in a while and that’s what he told me.”
Johnson got information about the two stalkers and Kerstyn’s last name from the officer. Maybe Giovanni had taken off with this Kerstyn girl. Maybe being married wasn’t all he thought it would be.
The men entered the security office where the tapes were loaded and ready to view. The lobby camera showed Julian briefly speaking with the security officer, smiling, waving, and then out the door for his run. The time on the film showed 4:27 a.m. The front outside camera followed him to the corner, where he crossed the street and disappeared out of the camera’s view. Films from the rest of the building, including the parking garage, showed nothing. Julian simply went out to run and never returned. Johnson had a bad feeling that this case would not have a good outcome.
Johnson and Billings then began conducting interviews with other tenants in the building. The apartments were huge, only two to a floor, with the one directly beneath the Giovanni’s belonging to Jillian and T.J. The other apartment owners seemed genuinely upset about Giovanni’s disappearance.
“I just pray you find him safe and well,” a former state official said. ”He really is a precious young man. I can’t tell you the number of times I needed help and he never told me no or said he was too busy, he just came to help,” the man told them. He was an odd-looking man. He was bald, with a small fringe of hair on the back of his head. He was uncommonly tall and lanky, and wore red suspenders to hold up his expensive slacks. He looked down his nose, through his bifocals at the two detectives. ”How did this happen? Our building security is the best money can buy. Maybe if the NYPD did a better job of protecting the tax paying citizens of this city, crime would not be on our very doorstep.”
These same sentiments were echoed by each tenant interviewed. Not one complaint or negative comment said about Julian Giovanni. He was very friendly and helpful to all the tenants they spoke too, as well as being active in the tenant rights committee. An elderly woman on the fourth floor told them a story similar to the one heard from the former state official.
“I called him out of the blue the morning my sweet Richard passed away. I don’t know why he was the first one that I thought of, or even why he was home that time of the day,” Mrs. Conner told the detectives. She walked slowly with a cane to her chair. She was frail and small, her gray hair up in a bun on top of her head. She walked humped over so she never really looked the men in the eye. ”He came right down here and called the ambulance and police for me. My poor Richard, he had been gone for a long time, you could tell. Julian made me feel safe and took care of me for days afterward, he and his little wife. That’s just the kind of boy he is,” she finished, beginning to cry as she told her story.
As the detectives wrapped up things for the night, Johnson was deep in thought about the case. ”Captain, Giovanni has to have an enemy somewhere in this city, I guess tomorrow it’s time to beat the pavement. Or, I guess I should say today.” He was looking at his watch; it was already 1:00 a.m.
“Let me know what you need Steven. The precinct will be at your disposal for the duration of this investigation. Start interviews with adjacent building tenants and then start interviews along his usual run route. This kid was too trusting; he never changed his run route that his family knew of. That mistake could’ve cost him his life. I’m assigning you a partner for this one since Thomas transferred.”
“No way, Captain! I will not break in a new partner on a case this public. I can use a couple of the other guys at the precinct for the grunt work and do the major stuff on my own.”
Before Billings had a chance to insist, the two men reached the building entrance. They immediately had microphones shoved in their faces and were blinded by camera flashes.
“Freakin’ press,” Captain Billings mumbled. The crowd began to fire questions at the two men.
“Are you here investigating Julian Giovanni’s disappearance?”
“Can you tell us what you know about the case?
“Do you have any word of where he might be, or if this is a kidnapping?”
“Have a good evening sir,” Johnson joked as he turned and left his Captain in the spotlight.
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Reviews
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This was pretty good. I’ve read the prologue and first chapter before and although I thought it was good before, you’ve definitely taken your writing up a few notches. Great job!
I understand what you’re trying to do with the first paragraph of the query letter and it’s a good idea. But, I think you need more of a punch to it. You also need to tell why your story is different than all the others. People survive abuse all the time. People’s lives are shattered by horrible things everyday. People write about it all the time. Here you want to give a hook or a twist that shows why this book is different than all the others. Or you could humanize the first paragraph by putting your protagonist in it. Suddenly it will become much more real if we have name to go with the suffering. I would also introduce the lead detective in your query.
Also you want to include the word count in a query. Salability can depend on the length of the novel. This is something the agent will want to know.
“the character” give the name of the character. The same with the detective.
“SJ Vance, author” don’t put author next to your name.
“His bed was hard, making it impossible to rest.” The hard bed made it impossible to rest.
“but stopped midway;” he didn’t stop, he was stopped by the handcuffs.
Quite the vivid image with the food, rat, and cockroaches!
“Concentrate! Find the way out of here.” Is he still talking to himself aloud? Most people don’t talk to themselves aloud this much. Also if he doesn’t know where he is or where his captors are it might be best not to make noise. If he’s not talking aloud then delete the quotation marks. Thoughts do not belong in quotation marks.
“seemed to be a basement.” I think the words ‘looked like’ would work better here.
The mayor and the judge are a great way to up the tension in the novel for poor Detective Stevens.
“the t’s crossed” ts
“massive amount of clothing.” Other clothing
“in on…,” he said.” Use an em-dash for interruptions.
“Kerstyn.” All the cute spellings get annoying after a while, Kathe, Allcia ….
Liked the ending.
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